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Was this rude, or am I just hopelessly old-school?

Home ▸ Archive ▸ Serious Business ▸ Was this rude, or am I just hopelessly old-school?
dwccrew's avatar

dwccrew

Not Banned

7,817 posts
Aug 7, 2011 12:22 PM
Fly4Fun;853950 wrote:I love statements like this.

The old "things were so much better in my day" mentality cracks me up all the time. One little anecdote doesn't speak for a whole generation. And even if it did just because one generation changes in one aspect, it doesn't mean as a whole it is necessarily worse. I would consider racism to be pretty self-absorbed/self centered because people wouldn't even take the time to learn about others. Racism starts with ignorance. People are ignorant because they are self-centered.

Therefore on that aspect I'd make the argument that people 40 years ago were a lot more self-centered than they are today. (I'm not saying racism is gone today, but it is a lot less prevalent.)

I hate it when people proclaim essentially that everything was better in their generation and society is only going downhill.
You and I are in the same generation. I just believe that people, especially today's youth (under 18), are much more disrespectful and more self absorbed then previous generations. See statement below.
fan_from_texas;854036 wrote:You obviously did the right thing, and the kids were/are morons. If your generation hadn't been such complete screw-ups as parents, kids today would be much better.

I tend to agree with this. I think each generation spoils their kids (not everyone, but a lot do) more and more. Everyone wants their kids to "have it better than they did". Some times they don't need better, they need exactly what you received. My future children will be raised exactly as I was raised. My parents instilled a respect for my elders mentality in me, made me work for things I wanted and I am grateful for how they raised me even though I probably thought it was unfair growing up.

Growing up I saw how some of my friends parents would buy them whatever they wanted and my parents made me get a job to buy things I wanted (clothes, videogames, car, etc.). Now I see these same friends struggling to get by because they were never taught the value of money or learned any work ethic. I am not rich by any means, but I am very comfortable and I can thank my parents for teaching me how to provide for myself.

IMO, this is what is lacking in the younger generations, mine included (I am 29).
Aug 7, 2011 12:22pm
M

Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Aug 7, 2011 12:59 PM
"I tend to agree with this. I think each generation spoils their kids (not everyone, but a lot do) more and more."

Agreed, I'm Gen-X, thus we are friends with people that have kids anywhere from newborns to high schoolers, it is amazing how large of a pedestal our generation put our kids on and the ridiculous entitlements and celebrations we give them, for God's sake it seems like a 2 year old's birthday is as important as graduating from college - the entitlement generation is a fault of the parents, not the kids.
Aug 7, 2011 12:59pm
F

fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Aug 7, 2011 1:13 PM
Manhattan Buckeye;854091 wrote:[T]he entitlement generation is a fault of the parents, not the kids.

I couldn't agree more. I agree that "kids these days" are fairly disrespectful, entitled, and generally filled with delusions of grandeur. But it's not like these kids raised themselves--it's the Boomers/Gen-Xers who massively screwed up parenting, and now seek to blame their kids for their own screw ups.
Aug 7, 2011 1:13pm
C

Con_Alma

Senior Member

12,198 posts
Aug 7, 2011 1:19 PM
fan_from_texas;854108 wrote:... and now seek to blame their kids for their own screw ups.
It seems lack of accountability is a common characteristic these days. It's always someone elses fault.
Aug 7, 2011 1:19pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:13 PM
Con_Alma;854115 wrote:It seems lack of accountability is a common characteristic these days. It's always someone elses fault.

You know who I blame? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.

Aug 7, 2011 2:13pm
Pick6's avatar

Pick6

A USA American

14,946 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:24 PM
jesus...another one of those "my generation is better than yours" threads...............
Im sure some kids around 10 years old playing their video game or whatever is really concerned about looking around and making sure no 80 year old is standing so they can give them their seat. Not to mention..they are 10..like they are really going to have that awareness.

Instead of bitching about the generation's getting worse (like a whole generation should be grouped into what a couple of kids didnt do LOL)...maybe welcome yourself to 2011 and call and make reservations to restaurants. There are usually waits if it is anywhere decent on a Saturday night.
Aug 7, 2011 2:24pm
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:30 PM
I think it's really annoying when kids play video games at restaurants.
Aug 7, 2011 2:30pm
Mohican00's avatar

Mohican00

Dirty White Boy

3,394 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:39 PM
I was an asshole as a kid. I learned.
Aug 7, 2011 2:39pm
Fly4Fun's avatar

Fly4Fun

Senior Member

7,730 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:49 PM
Go figure people didn't realize how probably self-centered they were as a kid... because those same kids were too busy to be self-centered to notice.

Kids ARE self-centered no matter WHAT generation they come from. That's because that's how kids develop psychologically. Babies aren't born as adults with all adult capabilities and social norms and everything. It's a learning process. At 10 years old I"m not surprised those kids are self-centered.

The people you should be mad at are the parents as previously said... the parents are the ones that should have alerted their boys to the situation and had them behave appropriately.

Once again, Kids being self-centered has nothing to do with "this generation" rather it has to do with the fact that kids ARE self-centered when they're young. The are completely self-centered I think till about 6 or so then begin to comprehend and empathize a bit but it takes a while.

Just the same way that teenagers, especially males take a lot of risk... they have practically no ability to foresee consequences.

Don't just assume kids or teenagers have all the same social and mental capabilities.

Try to be more understanding when dealing with anyone under the age of 20.
Aug 7, 2011 2:49pm
Pick6's avatar

Pick6

A USA American

14,946 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:50 PM
Fly4Fun;854164 wrote:Go figure people didn't realize how probably self-centered they were as a kid... because those same kids were too busy to be self-centered to notice.

Kids ARE self-centered no matter WHAT generation they come from. That's because that's how kids develop psychologically. Babies aren't born as adults with all adult capabilities and social norms and everything. It's a learning process. At 10 years old I"m not surprised those kids are self-centered.

The people you should be mad at are the parents as previously said... the parents are the ones that should have alerted their boys to the situation and had them behave appropriately.

Once again, Kids being self-centered has nothing to do with "this generation" rather it has to do with the fact that kids ARE self-centered when they're young. The are completely self-centered I think till about 6 or so then begin to comprehend and empathize a bit but it takes a while.

Just the same way that teenagers, especially males take a lot of risk... they have practically no ability to foresee consequences.

Don't just assume kids or teenagers have all the same social and mental capabilities.

Try to be more understanding when dealing with anyone under the age of 20.

WINNER!!!
Aug 7, 2011 2:50pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Aug 7, 2011 2:59 PM
Fly4Fun;854164 wrote:Go figure people didn't realize how probably self-centered they were as a kid... because those same kids were too busy to be self-centered to notice.

Kids ARE self-centered no matter WHAT generation they come from. That's because that's how kids develop psychologically. Babies aren't born as adults with all adult capabilities and social norms and everything. It's a learning process. At 10 years old I"m not surprised those kids are self-centered.

The people you should be mad at are the parents as previously said... the parents are the ones that should have alerted their boys to the situation and had them behave appropriately.

Once again, Kids being self-centered has nothing to do with "this generation" rather it has to do with the fact that kids ARE self-centered when they're young. The are completely self-centered I think till about 6 or so then begin to comprehend and empathize a bit but it takes a while.

Just the same way that teenagers, especially males take a lot of risk... they have practically no ability to foresee consequences.

Don't just assume kids or teenagers have all the same social and mental capabilities.

Try to be more understanding when dealing with anyone under the age of 20.

I agree with this, but it still wasn't rude of him to ask the kids to scoot over.
Aug 7, 2011 2:59pm
dwccrew's avatar

dwccrew

Not Banned

7,817 posts
Aug 7, 2011 3:08 PM
justincredible;854145 wrote:You know who I blame? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.

You leave Frank Stallone alone.
Aug 7, 2011 3:08pm
S

sportchampps

Senior Member

7,361 posts
Aug 7, 2011 4:22 PM
I think it's really annoying when kids play video games at restaurants.
As a former waiter its better to let kids play games then have kids that run around, visit the bathroom 10 times, cry, or scream the whole time. Most of the time the kids playing the game are so engrossed they just sit and wait patiently. Ive also had parents brind in portable dvd players to keep their kids busy. In the ADD society it helps alot. Now do I wish parents raised their kids to not play video games or run around yes but its the lesser of two evils.
Aug 7, 2011 4:22pm
Fly4Fun's avatar

Fly4Fun

Senior Member

7,730 posts
Aug 7, 2011 6:04 PM
Eh, when we were kids we usually only ate at places that had crayons and the white paper table cloth to draw on. It kept our attention along with playing tic-tac-toe. But every once in a while we went to a "fancy" restaurant, but we were always well behaved at those places since it was a reward for good grades at the end of the year an we knew if we misbehaved that'd be it.
Aug 7, 2011 6:04pm
Cat Food Flambe''s avatar

Cat Food Flambe'

Senior Member

1,230 posts
Aug 7, 2011 7:47 PM
I distinctly disagree with the statement that "this generation is out of control". They're absolutely no worse that we were at that age - and the behavior I mentioned was unusual enough for me to notice.

My generation (born in the Fifties) certainly has our share of jerks.
Aug 7, 2011 7:47pm
B

bogey

Member

99 posts
Aug 7, 2011 8:09 PM
I'm amazed each summer on our family trip to Disney about the number of females and elderly get on the bus to or from a park and stand while numerous males sit and look at them as they try to find a railing to hang onto as the bus moves. There is not a time that goes by that if I'm seated and see a female, elderly, or youth get on the bus and not have a seat that I get up and offer it to one of them.....I can honestly say that the offer for one of them to sit has never been turned down! Holding the door at a restaurant is treated much the same way. Youth today are losing sight of these things that often times take very little effort yet make someone's day much better.
Aug 7, 2011 8:09pm
baseball4's avatar

baseball4

Senior Member

279 posts
Aug 7, 2011 9:39 PM
Cat Food Flambe';853652 wrote:Lady D'Friskies and I took our parents (her Mom, my Dad, age 79 and 82 respectively) out for dinner in Dublin this evening. There was a short wait for an open table.

There was very little seating available in the waiting area, and three seats worth was taken up by a couple of what looked to be 12-year boys playing some sort of video game. There was nothing wrong with them as far as I could tell.

While is is going on, both of our parents, as well as a lady who looked to be about eight months pregnant, were standing around in full view of the boys. After ten minutes, my MIL was obviously suffering, so I asked the boys if they could move over so she could sit. They did, but I got a look from them as though I'd asked them give up screwing until they were forty.

The woman with the boys was engaged with a cell phone conversation during the entire period - no help there. To the credit of the hostess, she saw what was going on and managed to seat us AND the pregnant lady ahead of the boys and Ms Yapsalot (who sure didn't overlook THAT - "They, ah, called ahead, Ma'am"). :)

Growing up, I was taught that an able-bodied kids didn't take a seat in a situation like that unless all the women and older adults had a place to sit (not that there were many of the latter - generally, you were run down by a sabertooth tiger by the time you turned 40 and lost a few steps. :) ). Is this now completely out of vogue??

"Me-generation"

Also, kids nowadays just need their asses beat every once in a while.
Aug 7, 2011 9:39pm
M

Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Aug 7, 2011 9:54 PM
"But every once in a while we went to a "fancy" restaurant,"

That seems to be the point IMO, when most of us were growing up a night out was a rare event. In our experience helicopter parents expect society to accommodate their children as they still attempt to continue to live the single life. Children will be children, but parental attitudes have changed. We used to have holiday parties where it was very obvious it was an adult affair, yet friends would still bring Dakota and Chloe with them and expect us to accommodate them, if not fawn over them. I really think this is a gen-x thing, or at least a more recent phenomenon.
Aug 7, 2011 9:54pm
Scooter1369's avatar

Scooter1369

Bucks/Knights/Cats

179 posts
Aug 7, 2011 10:58 PM
I'm trying to think back to my childhood, if my brother and I had been the two boys in that situation with our mother taking us to dinner. I'm thinking that had we not moved voluntarily and quick enough for her, she would have beat our asses in front of God and everybody in the restaurant.
Aug 7, 2011 10:58pm
Scarlet_Buckeye's avatar

Scarlet_Buckeye

Senior Member

5,264 posts
Aug 8, 2011 9:31 AM
It's called basic manners...................something a lot of parents don't teach anymore. You did the right thing (and, in my opinion, were a little too nice about it).
Aug 8, 2011 9:31am
F

fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Aug 8, 2011 10:01 AM
Manhattan Buckeye;854549 wrote:In our experience helicopter parents expect society to accommodate their children as they still attempt to continue to live the single life. Children will be children, but parental attitudes have changed. We used to have holiday parties where it was very obvious it was an adult affair, yet friends would still bring Dakota and Chloe with them and expect us to accommodate them, if not fawn over them. I really think this is a gen-x thing, or at least a more recent phenomenon.

+1000000.

We throw a Christmas party for friends each year, and we've taken to putting on the invitation something to the effect of "Have a nice evening away from your kids" because so many parents would assume that it would be appropriate to bring a 2-year old to an adult Christmas party. We had a bit of a falling out with another couple when Mrs. FFT (tactfully) informed them that we didn't really want them to bring their two young kids (2 and 4) to the event--they were aghast and accused us of just hating kids.

We like kids. We just don't want them tearing through the Christmas decorations, smashing trinkets, and generally diverting attention when we're put together a nice event. We find a babysitter for the C-monster, and we're shocked that others seem to need to be told to do the same.
Aug 8, 2011 10:01am
Q

queencitybuckeye

Senior Member

7,117 posts
Aug 8, 2011 10:04 AM
Scarlet_Buckeye;854866 wrote:It's called basic manners...You did the right thing (and, in my opinion, were a little too nice about it).

Yes, as being an a-hole is the preferred method of teaching manners.
Aug 8, 2011 10:04am
T

thavoice

Senior Member

14,376 posts
Aug 8, 2011 10:30 AM
I saw that at a restuarant the other day as well. The parents told the 3 kids to give up their seats to an elderly couple. The kids yelled at the parents and said no.

I couldnt believe it. I told my stepkids if they ever did that..........well.....the rest wasnt nice.

Last Thursday night our park had a movie shown outside. A pregnant lady had her kid and carrying two chairs and was struggling. A few kids walked by and did nothing.....as did my stepson...until I told him to help the lady carry her seats.

The kids are more self centered....no doubt about that.........they are all engrossed in their electronic do-dads, but it is up to the parents to teach the kids so they can learn. Many are oblivious to what is going on around them. Case in point....step daughter....sat on the couch as I made 7-8 trips to the van to carry in everything from vacation. A few hours later she goes outside to the van........cannot find her bag. She comes in and asks if we forgot it at the hotel. She totaly didnt even notice all the comings and goings of me bringing everything in because of the computer and cell phone.

its a damned shame
Aug 8, 2011 10:30am
4cards's avatar

4cards

Ohio Chatter Legend

2,551 posts
Aug 8, 2011 10:42 AM
Scarlet_Buckeye;854866 wrote:It's called basic manners...................something a lot of parents don't teach anymore. You did the right thing (and, in my opinion, were a little too nice about it).


...Agree 100%
Aug 8, 2011 10:42am