LJ wrote: mmmhmmm and graduating college with a good gpa and good internships and not having to worry about how he is going to eat every week is what he has to work for.

You can argue it all you want, I don't care. I've lived it. I enjoy my life, I have a little extra cash when I need it, I'm certainly not starving, and I'm not worrying about how next month's mortgage is going to get paid. All the while, still being able to pay off my student loans. Like I said, I've done it, so I know anyone else can too.

GoChiefs wrote:

LJ wrote: mmmhmmm and graduating college with a good gpa and good internships and not having to worry about how he is going to eat every week is what he has to work for.

You can argue it all you want, I don't care. I've lived it. I enjoy my life, I have a little extra cash when I need it, I'm certainly not starving, and I'm not worrying about how next month's mortgage is going to get paid. All the while, still being able to pay off my student loans. Like I said, I've done it, so I know anyone else can too.

You're right, anyone can go out and rack up debt, that is the easy part.

GoChiefs wrote: Like I said, I've done it, so I know anyone else can too.

This is ALWAYS a stupid thing to say. Always.

LJ wrote: You're right, anyone can go out and rack up debt, that is the easy part.

Again, life isn't easy. Work hard and pay the shit off. It's not a hard concept. You want a college education, go get one.

GoChiefs wrote:

LJ wrote: You're right, anyone can go out and rack up debt, that is the easy part.

Again, life isn't easy. Work hard and pay the shit off. It's not a hard concept. You want a college education, go get one.

And if you can make it so your kid doesn't have the burden of student debt, you should make it so.

All you are doing is saying that you are OK with what I said I don't want my kids to have. You are not saying that they can do what I want for them by themselves.

SQ_Crazies wrote:

GoChiefs wrote: Like I said, I've done it, so I know anyone else can too.

This is ALWAYS a stupid thing to say. Always.

What's so stupid about it? I've experienced it, so I know what it takes to be able to do it. You put your mind to it, and anyone can do it.

GoChiefs wrote:

LJ wrote: mmmhmmm and graduating college with a good gpa and good internships and not having to worry about how he is going to eat every week is what he has to work for.

You can argue it all you want, I don't care. I've lived it. I enjoy my life, I have a little extra cash when I need it, I'm certainly not starving, and I'm not worrying about how next month's mortgage is going to get paid. All the while, still being able to pay off my student loans. Like I said, I've done it, so I know anyone else can too.

ok, sort of a personal question. but would you say your life is better than your parent's life? i mean, to me it sounds like you are having the same sort of life your parents had, and this is the same sort of life you will be giving to your kids.

LJ wrote: And if you can make it so your kid doesn't have the burden of student debt, you should make it so.

That's just where our parenting ideas differ.

Glory Days wrote: ok, sort of a personal question. but would you say your life is better than your parent's life? i mean, to me it sounds like you are having the same sort of life your parents had, and this is the same sort of life you will be giving to your kids.

I'm better off than my parents were in this stage of their lives, yes. Again, I enjoy my life. I would have no issues if this is the kind of life my son has. If it is, great. He will have a good life as well.

I'm pretty much in GoChiefs' boat on this one. My mom paid for one semester of college and I had to pay the rest. She did co-sign on my student loans, but I paid them off. There's a lot to be said for doing it on your own, per se. The first couple years I was able to live at home which helped, but I did miss out on a lot of the on-campus life.

The ex and I agree that my daughter can continue to stay with us as she goes through school. The great grand parents set aside money to help her with her education. I would expect that if she needs money for college, she can qualify for grants and scholarships and/or take out her own loans. As far as I'm concerned, it's her life and she should be the one responsible to pay for it... just as I had to.

You just can't point to one answer and say it's THE only way to do it. Kids are different.

My kids had their first year paid for in full, then had to assume 20% of the cost beginning with the sophomore year - I wanted them to have a financial stake in the matter. Their share went up if their GPA dropped - and if you dropped below a 2.25 for two terms in a row, my funding of your college education ceased completely.

Three kids, three different results:

- One kid decided after sophomore year that they "wanted to experience the working world" - just in time for the bottom to drop out of the economy. He/she is now back in college on their own dime - two courses a quarter at TOSU/Columbus State while living at home (OK, rent-free - I'm not a total hard-ass) and working full-time. This kid will have about $14K in student loans when/if they graduate.

- One kid charged through college, and took full advantage of parental funding. This kid will have zero student debt - worked part-time all through the last three years, and borrowed $4K for their senior year As a graduation gift, we assume responsibility for the loan (we'll pay it during the six-month grace period) in recognition of the 3.8 GPA. (Don't tell the others this - but I would do the same for them as well, withing $$$ limits. ) Kid is interviewing for three jobs as we speak in their chosen area of study.

- Last kid received the academic death penalty, basically partying their way out of school (as in invited to not come back after freshmen year). This one dicked around with a community college in the same town for two semesters, but failed more courses than they passed (different school, same situation). They are now trying to survive on a $10-an-hour job while waiting for the "significant other" to find a job following graduation. This kid is debt free - but the SO has about $80K in college debt in a area in which graduates are lucky to make $30K per year, and hasn't landed so much as an interview. I sincerely worry about these two.

Ask the first and last about the value of a college education!

My parents told me up fron tthey would cover the 1st two years and the rest was my responsibility. I didn't have a problem with that. I have about 20K in loans (including MBA program).

Im in a community college now..also have a part time job and work 25-30 hours a week, making minimum wage.
This coming year I am going to transfer for Akron and plan on looking for a new job up there. My parents make decent money I guess..however, its not really enough for them to help me and too much for me to get much financial aid..so I will be in some debt when I graduate.

It would be great if they could help me. But thats life..Im actually looking into the ROTC programs now for some help.

I'm glad my parents aren't gochiefs is all I can say lol

I think that the parents should help the kid as much as possible, not do it for them but not let them start off life in a huge hole. My dad did nothing for me as far as college. I took two qtrs on my own dime and thought fuck this, worked construction for 5 yrs and decided I need a college education. Now I have a wife, house,cars, 2 kids and own a business. I just went back to college and working my way through and my view has changed at first I thought I can do it my kids will learn the hard way. Now I want my kids to have the satisfaction of doing things themselves but help them a little along the way.

GoChiefs seems to build his parenting ideas on the principles of "they'll have to work for everything in life, why not this?" instead of even considering if it's the most effective.

And hell, he did it so why can't they?

The question I have is, why would you want them to have to go through what you did?

Right now I guess I'm technically paying for my schooling, I have tons of loans, but I know if my parents were able to they'd pay as much of my school as I can and I appreciate the hell out of that. Of course it's difficult when there are 3 out of 4 kids currently in college with the last to start next year.

DeyDurkie5 wrote: I'm glad my parents aren't gochiefs is all I can say lol

Yes...b/c god forbid you should have to work for something on your own huh? :rolleyes: My son is spoiled, he gets almost anything he wants, within reason. So a lot of kids would actually like to have someone like me and my wife as parents. Until they are older of course.

I Wear Pants wrote: The question I have is, why would you want them to have to go through what you did?

B/c nothing I had to go through has been too difficult to get through. B/c it has helped make me who I am today. Again...if I had a shitty life, I could understand your question. But, I don't. So..why WOULDN'T I want them to have to go through what I did???

GoChiefs wrote:

DeyDurkie5 wrote: I'm glad my parents aren't gochiefs is all I can say lol

Yes...b/c god forbid you should have to work for something on your own huh? :rolleyes:

I Wear Pants wrote: The question I have is, why would you want them to have to go through what you did?

B/c nothing I had to go through has been too difficult to get through. B/c it has helped make me who I am today. Again...if I had a shitty life, I could understand your question. But, I don't. So..why WOULDN'T I want them to have to go through what I did???

god forbid you help your kids out if you are capable:rolleyes:

Dude, good for you for doing your thing. But seriously:

GoChiefs wrote:

DeyDurkie5 wrote: I'm glad my parents aren't gochiefs is all I can say lol

Yes...b/c god forbid you should have to work for something on your own huh? :rolleyes: My son is spoiled, he gets almost anything he wants, within reason. So a lot of kids would actually like to have someone like me and my wife as parents. Until they are older of course.

I Wear Pants wrote: The question I have is, why would you want them to have to go through what you did?

B/c nothing I had to go through has been too difficult to get through. B/c it has helped make me who I am today. Again...if I had a shitty life, I could understand your question. But, I don't. So..why WOULDN'T I want them to have to go through what I did???

Because it should be their life, not yours.

DeyDurkie5 wrote: god forbid you help your kids out if you are capable:rolleyes:

Again, my son gets anything he wants right now. So, I help him out plenty. College will be his life/financial decision. Not mine. He wants it, he's going to earn it himself.

LJ wrote: Because it should be their life, not yours.

Yeah. No shit. That's what I've been saying all along. It's his life. Let him be responsible for his choices.

GoChiefs wrote:

LJ wrote: Because it should be their life, not yours.

Yeah. No shit. That's what I've been saying all along. It's his life. Let him be responsible for his choices.

and you should be there to HELP him out in any way you can.

GoChiefs wrote:

LJ wrote: Because it should be their life, not yours.

Yeah. No shit. That's what I've been saying all along. It's his life. Let him be responsible for his choices.

are you going to kick your kids out when they turn 18 too?

LJ wrote: and you should be there to HELP him out in any way you can.

Do I really need to repeat an answer from above yet again? If he wants something, he can earn it. Again, our parenting ideas obviously differ. You want to spend thousands of dollars on something that your kid might not ever use. Congratulations. That's on you. But, I don't.