Dumbest first names you've heard?

Serious Business 147 replies 5,206 views
ohiobucks1's avatar
ohiobucks1
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Jan 15, 2011 12:21pm
Cigarette
GoChiefs's avatar
GoChiefs
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Jan 15, 2011 1:28pm
ernest_t_bass;638933 wrote:Clark
Gibby
Ty
Mike
Saul
Sonofanump;638996 wrote:Elliot
Tully
Davey
Blanket

Thats pathetic. Didn't realize he had THAT many names.
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darbypitcher22
Posts: 8,000
Jan 15, 2011 9:05pm
sherm03;638839 wrote:After looking to see what SirValiant Brown is up to...came across the fact that his brother is named Cody SirLancelot Brown.

http://www.nba.com/dleague/players/sirvaliant_brown.html

His parents must have spent a ton of time @ the renaissance fair
OSH's avatar
OSH
Posts: 4,145
Jan 15, 2011 9:56pm
karen lotz;639014 wrote:ESPN bottom line had the NFL injury reports scrolling last night. Saw a guy with the first name Atari is questionable.

That's Atari Bigby. Plays for my Green Bay Packers! He hasn't really played all season. He probably won't be a Packer next year.

GO PACK GO!
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OSH
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Jan 15, 2011 9:58pm
karen lotz;639014 wrote:ESPN bottom line had the NFL injury reports scrolling last night. Saw a guy with the first name Atari is questionable.

That's Atari Bigby. Plays for my Green Bay Packers! He hasn't really played all season. He probably won't be a Packer next year.

GO PACK GO!
Little Danny's avatar
Little Danny
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Jan 15, 2011 10:13pm
Ghetto names have been prominent in this thread, but I would like to take the time now to make fun of the white people a little. For those of you who have family members (maybe your own children) I apologize, but I really would like to see all the names Aiden, Cayden, Jayden, Braiding, Fayden, Laden (with their multiple spellings) to stop. Ditto with Katelyn and the 100 ways to spell that name as well.
OSH's avatar
OSH
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Jan 15, 2011 10:32pm
I understand what you say Little Danny...but what is the correct spelling for some of those names? What is the proper way to spell Aiden, Adin, Aydyn, Aden, etc.? Or Katelyn, Katlin, Kaitlyn, Caitlyn, Kaytlyn, etc.?
M
Manhattan Buckeye
Posts: 7,566
Jan 15, 2011 11:04pm
OSH;639967 wrote:I understand what you say Little Danny...but what is the correct spelling for some of those names? What is the proper way to spell Aiden, Adin, Aydyn, Aden, etc.? Or Katelyn, Katlin, Kaitlyn, Caitlyn, Kaytlyn, etc.?

Aiden is spelled Aiden. It is an Irish name that for some reason is popular now. The other names you mention are just efforts by suburban soccer moms to make their kids special, when likely they just want to fit in.

And while we're talking about stereotypical suburban white names, if your name is Dakota...change it. That is the worst instance of just making up a name.
GoChiefs's avatar
GoChiefs
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Jan 15, 2011 11:19pm
Manhattan Buckeye;639983 wrote:The other names you mention are just efforts by suburban soccer moms to make their kids special,
My cousin is like this. She named her daughter Carsynn. Like Carson. I still give her shit for it. So fucking retarded.
Manhattan Buckeye;639983 wrote: if your name is Dakota...change it. That is the worst instance of just making up a name.

Fuck off. That's the name of my husky damn it. Had nothing to do with making up a name. :p
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Curly J
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Jan 15, 2011 11:42pm
I have a niece named Whitlee Raychelle. The Lee was my grandpa's name. Ray is my Bro-in-laws best friend and Chelle is great friend of my sister...I still think it sounds/spelled ghetto, but that's just me. Especially since ny Bro-in-law was such a 'neck'.
M
Manhattan Buckeye
Posts: 7,566
Jan 15, 2011 11:54pm
GoChiefs;639986 wrote:My cousin is like this. She named her daughter Carsynn. Like Carson. I still give her shit for it. So fucking retarded.



Fuck off. That's the name of my husky damn it. Had nothing to do with making up a name. :p

LOL. No joke, my parents have a Husky named Dakota as well! Great name for a dog, not so much for a kid. Good dog...not the brightest guy, but he's loyal.
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GoChiefs
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Jan 16, 2011 12:01am
Manhattan Buckeye;640001 wrote:LOL. No joke, my parents have a Husky named Dakota as well! Great name for a dog, not so much for a kid. Good dog...not the brightest guy, but he's loyal.

Kinda funny, from the same litter that my Dakota was from, I gave one of her brothers to a co-worker of mine. He gave it to his brother as a gift. Talked to him later on, turns out he named his husky Dakota too.

My Dakota is retarded as hell too.
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krambman
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Jan 16, 2011 12:25am
I was counseling camp one summer and we had a kid named Brick Payne and his brother's first name was Wood. Unfortunately for them they were very small for their age so with names like that you know they were going to get beat up in high school. Probably wouldn't have been so bad if they were linebackers.
V
vball10set
Posts: 24,795
Jan 16, 2011 8:32am
for a white dude, Jimmer..as in Jimmer Fredette at BYU
Little Danny's avatar
Little Danny
Posts: 4,288
Jan 16, 2011 11:09am
QUOTE=Manhattan Buckeye;639983]Aiden is spelled Aiden. It is an Irish name that for some reason is popular now. The other names you mention are just efforts by suburban soccer moms to make their kids special, when likely they just want to fit in.

And while we're talking about stereotypical suburban white names, if your name is Dakota...change it. That is the worst instance of just making up a name.[/QUOTE]

That's just it, the name is not special. Aiden/Kayden et al. is now so common they will probably have a bunch of classmates with the same name. If they want want him/her to stand out they should name them a name we all grew up with like Dave or Amy.

Not to pick on Browns fans, but having a kid from Texas named Colt is pretty ridiculous.
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ZWICK 4 PREZ
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Jan 16, 2011 11:09am
GoChiefs;640007 wrote: My Dakota is retarded as hell too.


Well they say the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.
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coyotes22
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Jan 16, 2011 11:14am
Jeremy
LJ's avatar
LJ
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Jan 16, 2011 1:18pm
Our Cocker Spaniel's name is Dakota and she is flat out retarded
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krambman
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Jan 16, 2011 5:26pm
Bigred1995;638029 wrote:Worked with a guy named Juston pronounced just like Justin?

I hate it when people with normal names who have weird or unnesseary spellings, like Aimmie.
T
Timber
Posts: 935
Jan 16, 2011 6:13pm
I have a daughter with the name Kaitlin.

My wife and I simply liked the name... and it has a nice pairing with her last name.

My daughter does not live in the suberb, nor is she caucasion.

As for the spelling... "Kaitlin" We think she is very fortunate to be able to dot the i twice in her first name :)
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GoChiefs
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Jan 16, 2011 6:31pm
coyotes22;640144 wrote:Jeremy

Peter. I mean, why the hell would your parents name you after a cock?
NNN's avatar
NNN
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Jan 17, 2011 10:47pm
Little Danny;639950 wrote:Ghetto names have been prominent in this thread, but I would like to take the time now to make fun of the white people a little. For those of you who have family members (maybe your own children) I apologize, but I really would like to see all the names Aiden, Cayden, Jayden, Braiding, Fayden, Laden (with their multiple spellings) to stop. Ditto with Katelyn and the 100 ways to spell that name as well.
Let it be known that in 10 years, kids will be saying "I'm going to see Uncle Connor and Aunt Briana this weekend." Actually, knowing the preferences of the typical Connor, it would be more like "I'm going to see Uncle Connor and Aunt Gary".
OSH;639967 wrote:I understand what you say Little Danny...but what is the correct spelling for some of those names? What is the proper way to spell Aiden, Adin, Aydyn, Aden, etc.? Or Katelyn, Katlin, Kaitlyn, Caitlyn, Kaytlyn, etc.?

Proper way to spell them? "John", "Michael", "Joseph", or "my parents are pseudo-Irish homos who like the Red Sox even though they were born and raised in Kansas and have never been east of the Mississippi River".
Manhattan Buckeye;639983 wrote:Aiden is spelled Aiden. It is an Irish name that for some reason is popular now. The other names you mention are just efforts by suburban soccer moms to make their kids special, when likely they just want to fit in.
One of the ultimate crimes against humanity involves mismatched ethnicities, and the pseudo-Irish (and actual Irish) are the worst offenders of this. My last name is Hungarian. This means that, if I so choose, I can name my kid Levente, Csaba, Janos, Tamas, or anything else along those lines. What I cannot name the kid is Connor, Keegan, Giovanni (even though I'm half-Italian in descent), Lars, or Teppo.

And yet all the time, I seem to see these halfbreed little bastards with some empty-sacked feeble excuse of a father who allows his 6% Irish wife to make a decision. "Oh, we decided to name the kid after my great-great-grandfather, who came over from Ireland because he was driven out of town for being too sober. So our son is named Connor O'Callahan Tsakashvili."

And if anyone thinks I'm being too hard on the Irish, I don't agree. If anything, I'm being too soft on those limp-dicked drunken gingers.
NNN's avatar
NNN
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Jan 17, 2011 10:49pm
My other contribution to the thread involves having purchased a Christmas gift from a female retail clerk named Lyric. She was also about 4" taller than I am.
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Little Danny
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Jan 18, 2011 6:52am
NNN;642101 wrote:Let it be known that in 10 years, kids will be saying "I'm going to see Uncle Connor and Aunt Briana this weekend." Actually, knowing the preferences of the typical Connor, it would be more like "I'm going to see Uncle Connor and Aunt Gary".



Proper way to spell them? "John", "Michael", "Joseph", or "my parents are pseudo-Irish homos who like the Red Sox even though they were born and raised in Kansas and have never been east of the Mississippi River".



One of the ultimate crimes against humanity involves mismatched ethnicities, and the pseudo-Irish (and actual Irish) are the worst offenders of this. My last name is Hungarian. This means that, if I so choose, I can name my kid Levente, Csaba, Janos, Tamas, or anything else along those lines. What I cannot name the kid is Connor, Keegan, Giovanni (even though I'm half-Italian in descent), Lars, or Teppo.

And yet all the time, I seem to see these halfbreed little bastards with some empty-sacked feeble excuse of a father who allows his 6% Irish wife to make a decision. "Oh, we decided to name the kid after my great-great-grandfather, who came over from Ireland because he was driven out of town for being too sober. So our son is named Connor O'Callahan Tsakashvili."

And if anyone thinks I'm being too hard on the Irish, I don't agree. If anything, I'm being too soft on those limp-dicked drunken gingers.

Spot on!
V
vball10set
Posts: 24,795
Jan 18, 2011 7:55am
GoChiefs;640581 wrote:Peter. I mean, why the hell would your parents name you after a cock?

good post, Richard :p