So today I went out on a bicycle ride with my 12 year old. As a background, his mom and I have been divorced for 10 years. They live a couple hours away so I only have him every other weekend. My relationship with his mother post divorce has been very hostile even up to today. She has been very rude to my family members, has repeatedly talked bad about me to him, has never involved me with his school and other extracirricular activities (I have had to make the habit of getting involved myself- calling teachers, coaches, etc.). Each weekend she interrogates my son about what happened at my house and has always made a point of throwing it back in my face. For instance, once I sent him to his room for throwing a fit when he did not like our dinner choice. He told his mom and she made a point of calling me and telling me how horrible of a parent/person I was for making him eat something he did not like.

So today we went on a bike ride. My son was in rare form today. For some reason he just was not having a good day on the bike. He was lagging behind and refusing to keep up (I was coasting for the most part). I tried to give him a tip to help him ride better when he started yelling "He was not listening to me" and covering his ears. I grabbed him by the collar and told to stop being such a little a-hole and listen to me(in full disclosure, it has been a rough weekend on a personal level for other reasons). Of course, he vowed to tell his mother and that he was never coming back.

Moral to the story.... if you have kids, don't get divorced. Better yet, just stay single and live in your parents basement. Life will be a heck of a lot stressful

That sucks, man. Sounds like she is doing a number on your kid.

^^ I know. That part has been the most hurtful. I can take the jabs at me, but it sucks when my kid is in the middle or other family members get hurt.

That sucks dude. That would so tough to deal with.

smoke a joint

Wrong on so many levels(your x). Stick with him. Boys need Dads. With out you she will ruin his chances of being a man. No books,no advice, just the best you can do is all you can do.

he'll come around. stick with it. and fuck her friends.

thavoice, this is your future. by the way is he still around?

Write everything down. Take her back to court for custody.

sorry to hear that things are still like that after all of this time.

My parents got divorced 7th going into 8th grade. They were hostile towards each other at first, which I guess is normal. But now I get along with both my step mom and dad and all of their families have accepted me and seem to treat me just as even as their real family. Parents and step parents also get along well now.

I'd imagine my situation is better than mosts.

Keep on loving him and keep being interested and keep being the bigger person. Your son knows you are just looking out for him, but a 12 year old will always take the path of least resistance. It will take years, but once your son gets to the age where he can appreciate what you do, you will reap the rewards.

Im a divorced mother of 2 boys, and women like that make me absolutely sick. Good luck!

redstreak one;1120090 wrote:Keep on loving him and keep being interested and keep being the bigger person. Your son knows you are just looking out for him, but a 12 year old will always take the path of least resistance. It will take years, but once your son gets to the age where he can appreciate what you do, you will reap the rewards.

This. He will realize one day... Little comfort now I know but is exactly what ppl kept telling me. (moms aren't the only ones who play these games with kids. My ex was a master at it)

redstreak one;1120090 wrote:Keep on loving him and keep being interested and keep being the bigger person. Your son knows you are just looking out for him, but a 12 year old will always take the path of least resistance. It will take years, but once your son gets to the age where he can appreciate what you do, you will reap the rewards.

This. Divorce is tough on kids. Just keep doing the right thing, and it'll pay off in the long run.