Fab1b wrote:
I didn't the first time and I won't the next time!! I had/have (engaged now) good relationships with both dads however I just don't believe in that. She is a grown woman he has no say, like someone above asked what if he says no??
I see where you are coming from, and respect your opinion. It certainly varies for everybody, to each his own, if you will. The one thing that I would add to the other side of the coin, is that as you know being married once before, you aren't just marrying the girl, it's pretty much a package deal with her family. When you ask for the parents "blessing" yes, in the most straightforward sense you are asking for her hand in marriage; but it is a sign of respect basically asking them to accept YOU into their family...no longer are you "the daughters boyfriend" you will legally be recognized as THEIR son-in-law. Again, I see where you're coming from, but IMO there is more to it than just the straight forward question of 'can I marry your daughter'.
(And also, if you are a good guy, and you've always had a good relationship with her parents and they say NO out of the blue, and don't give you a specific AND legitimate reason, then I would say eff em and do it anyway, as I agree that ultimately it is up to you and her as adults. at least you asked, it's their dumbass problem if they say no for no apparent reason).
