Bullying and Social Media

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MontyBrunswick

Mar 4, 2013 10:07 PM
Benny The Jet;1400182 wrote: Parents think school needs to step in because they're both students at the school and it's hurting Kid A's grades.
Parents are wrong. The school is there to teach children, not police children.

If your kid is getting bullied, then the parents need to get off of their lazy ass and deal with the other kids' parents.

If they use the school to cough up that information -- so be it...but it's not the responsibility of the school to sort it out.

School is for learning, not for counseling.

They're already punishing students parents for truancy, why not do it for bullying as well?
Mar 4, 2013 10:07pm
se-alum's avatar

se-alum

The Biggest Boss

13,948 posts
Mar 4, 2013 10:55 PM
Benny The Jet;1400182 wrote:Here's one of the examples from our situation. Kid A who is typically a good student and gets good grades starts doing poorly in school and moping around school. Parents meet with teacher and tell them Kid A is being bullied online by Kid B who goes to school with them. Kid B just ignores Kid A at school but is messing with him online. Parents think school needs to step in because they're both students at the school and it's hurting Kid A's grades.
Kid A's parents need to take the offensive material to the police. There are laws against harassment and menacing. The school has no authority or responsibility in this matter.
Mar 4, 2013 10:55pm
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Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Mar 5, 2013 2:48 AM
Out of curiosity what on earth do they want the school to do? If it is severe harassment it is a police/civil matter.
Mar 5, 2013 2:48am
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fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Mar 5, 2013 9:13 AM
http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/volokh/mainfeed/~3/-Uyesl5lvt8/

Timely article on this issue. Basically, the school can't do much. The parents have to take the lead if they want something done.
Mar 5, 2013 9:13am
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Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Mar 5, 2013 9:26 AM
^^^

That might be the most idiotic law I've read in some time. My favorite portion:

conduct that "has a detrimental effect on the physical, social, or emotional health of a student;"

So I guess when I was in public school if the head cheerleader turned me down for prom she would be considered a bully. Or maybe I was the bully for asking her out in the first place.

Our public schools really need a re-boot.
Mar 5, 2013 9:26am
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Gblock

Mar 5, 2013 9:28 AM
kids get suspended all the time at my school for things they say about another student on fb.
Mar 5, 2013 9:28am
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Con_Alma

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12,198 posts
Mar 5, 2013 9:28 AM
Manhattan Buckeye;1400317 wrote:....

Our public schools really need a re-boot.
Amen to that.
Mar 5, 2013 9:28am
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FatHobbit

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8,651 posts
Mar 5, 2013 9:31 AM
Manhattan Buckeye;1400317 wrote:Our public schools really need a re-boot.
Public school funding needs a reboot too.
Mar 5, 2013 9:31am
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hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:20 AM
gut;1400156 wrote:Not an educational issue it's a disciplinary, perhaps a safety, issue. I'm not sure there's much argument that removing a disruptive kid benefits the educational process for the rest.
It depends on how disruptive. Suspending is not a way to correct behavior. There needs to be a better way.
Gblock;1400318 wrote:kids get suspended all the time at my school for things they say about another student on fb.
Which is stupid.
Mar 5, 2013 10:20am
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fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:32 AM
Gblock;1400318 wrote:kids get suspended all the time at my school for things they say about another student on fb.

Probably unconstitutional and could be challenged. Schools have to be very careful about regulating off campus speech that complies with the 1st A.
Mar 5, 2013 10:32am
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Gblock

Mar 5, 2013 10:44 AM
fan_from_texas;1400371 wrote:Probably unconstitutional and could be challenged. Schools have to be very careful about regulating off campus speech that complies with the 1st A.
Schools dont go out of their way to get involved but when it spills into the schools or parents come in and pull up the facebook page on their phone etc it results in suspension. with the focus on anti bullying campaigns in the schools as an emphasis it is usually a zero tolerance policy... i would say this happens at least once a month or more. i have yet to see it challenged but if this was in the suburbs maybe it could be i guess
Mar 5, 2013 10:44am
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Benny The Jet

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2,987 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:49 AM
Gblock;1400379 wrote:Schools dont go out of their way to get involved but when it spills into the schools or parents come in and pull up the facebook page on their phone etc it results in suspension. with the focus on anti bullying campaigns in the schools as an emphasis it is usually a zero tolerance policy... i would say this happens at least once a month or more. i have yet to see it challenged but if this was in the suburbs maybe it could be i guess
We have a zero-tolerance policy as well. The parents come in and throw that around and how it's affecting their child's school work and the online bully is in the same school. They keep pushing and pushing stating that if it was zero tolerance, then we should suspend the online bully. It's a real tricky situation, especially when the parents call the local newspapers and TV to complain about the school. No school wants negative PR.
Mar 5, 2013 10:49am
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Gblock

Mar 5, 2013 10:53 AM
Benny The Jet;1400385 wrote:We have a zero-tolerance policy as well. The parents come in and throw that around and how it's affecting their child's school work and the online bully is in the same school. They keep pushing and pushing stating that if it was zero tolerance, then we should suspend the online bully. It's a real tricky situation, especially when the parents call the local newspapers and TV to complain about the school. No school wants negative PR.
honestly a lot of the times the comments are pretty blatent and harrassment. it hasnt been too fine a line and frankly most parents have been appalled when they have seen what their child wrote. i could see where it could get tricky trying to define what is bullying/harrassment at times
Mar 5, 2013 10:53am
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Manhattan Buckeye

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7,566 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:55 AM
Times have certainly changed then. At my HS about 20 years ago a guy took a no-contest plea for sexual assault, took his time in Juvie and after 6 months was back at school where the alleged victim attended (the whole scenario is a bit more complicated, my guess is the incident was somewhere between her and his story). Even in a criminal (albeit juvenile) matter there wasn't much the school could do - enforce a restraining order perhaps? But even so the school would need a court order. When did public schools become the arbiters of law enforcement?
Mar 5, 2013 10:55am
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:56 AM
Gblock;1400388 wrote:honestly a lot of the times the comments are pretty blatent and harrassment. it hasnt been too fine a line and frankly most parents have been appalled when they have seen what their child wrote. i could see where it could get tricky trying to define what is bullying/harrassment at times
Let the parents handle it. Schools should not be responsible for monitoring facebook, unless they can prove it was posted during school hours.
Mar 5, 2013 10:56am
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Benny The Jet

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2,987 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:57 AM
I agree, the tricky part isn't really what the kids are saying to each other. They can be downright awful and threatening. And like you said, a lot of these parents think their child is an angel too until they see some of the messages they send back and forth. The tricky part is if the school should step in if it's happening on a computer at home, but involves a fellow student at the school.
Mar 5, 2013 10:57am
M

Manhattan Buckeye

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7,566 posts
Mar 5, 2013 10:59 AM
hasbeen;1400391 wrote:Let the parents handle it. Schools should not be responsible for monitoring facebook, unless they can prove it was posted during school hours.
This is correct and is a part of why it is troubling schools are involved in this. There is an authentication issue. Hell, one of my wife's old e-mail addresses that she no longer monitors sends spam to her contacts every now and then - that doesn't mean she sent it. This is an issue that the schools are likely ill-equipped to deal with.
Mar 5, 2013 10:59am
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:04 AM
Benny The Jet;1400393 wrote:I agree, the tricky part isn't really what the kids are saying to each other. They can be downright awful and threatening. And like you said, a lot of these parents think their child is an angel too until they see some of the messages they send back and forth. The tricky part is if the school should step in if it's happening on a computer at home, but involves a fellow student at the school.
Then the parents need to go to the other child's parents or the police.

If two students from Ohio Chatter High School play on two different summer baseball teams and they get into an altercation is that the school's business? No. Not sure how facebook is either.
Mar 5, 2013 11:04am
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fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:07 AM
Benny The Jet;1400393 wrote: The tricky part is if the school should step in if it's happening on a computer at home, but involves a fellow student at the school.

That's not a tricky part. The school doesn't have much authority to do anything and is vastly overreaching if it tries. Let the parents sort it out.
Mar 5, 2013 11:07am
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Fly4Fun

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7,730 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:25 AM
fan_from_texas;1400400 wrote:That's not a tricky part. The school doesn't have much authority to do anything and is vastly overreaching if it tries. Let the parents sort it out.
Pft, parents taking responsibility for their own kids? That's crazy talk!

While that does sound ideal, there are some problems that come up in the form of parents who are either blind to their own kids faults, blind to their own faults in parenting technique, OR just don't care that their own child has behaved in such a manner. But hopefully reasonable adults would be able to talk through to a solution.

However, there is a point when a parent just has to sit down with their own kid and explain the realities of the world we live in.

I think the fact that "bullying" is one of the top concerns regarding social problems at the moment signifies the fact that we are still doing relatively well as a country.
Mar 5, 2013 11:25am
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FatHobbit

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8,651 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:30 AM
Fly4Fun;1400405 wrote:However, there is a point when a parent just has to sit down with their own kid and explain the realities of the world we live in.
When I was a kid and other kids picked on me, my dad told me to just punch them in the mouth and they will leave you alone. I got in two fights and they left me alone after that. (I didn't even win. They just had to know if they wanted to mess with me it was going to hurt.) Today I would be suspended because of zero tolerance policies.
Mar 5, 2013 11:30am
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Manhattan Buckeye

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7,566 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:37 AM
FatHobbit;1400413 wrote:When I was a kid and other kids picked on me, my dad told me to just punch them in the mouth and they will leave you alone. I got in two fights and they left me alone after that. (I didn't even win. They just had to know if they wanted to mess with me it was going to hurt.) Today I would be suspended because of zero tolerance policies.
I agree with this completely, but on the other hand there is something to the publicity of social media today that our young people have to manage. Being "bullied" has been around forever (even on the school bus I was likely "bullied" by kids that were jealous that we actually owned our own farm and weren't on welfare - but all they could do was just make fun of me, for what? Not being held back a grade?), but it hasn't always been this public. That said, I agree this is a matter for the parents if the kids aren't able to defend themselves, not the school district.
Mar 5, 2013 11:37am
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Fly4Fun

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7,730 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:50 AM
FatHobbit;1400413 wrote:When I was a kid and other kids picked on me, my dad told me to just punch them in the mouth and they will leave you alone. I got in two fights and they left me alone after that. (I didn't even win. They just had to know if they wanted to mess with me it was going to hurt.) Today I would be suspended because of zero tolerance policies.
Are fights now a zero-tolerance situation where they don't account for the circumstances?

It's been a while since I was in grade school, but in the 90's the staff generally tried to figure out the circumstances and handle punishment appropriately.
Mar 5, 2013 11:50am
G

Gblock

Mar 5, 2013 11:52 AM
most of the time its student A getting on student B's page and saying im going to kick your A** or You suck d*** or your mom sucks d*** etc..

as far as the police..they dont really have time for this around here. i doubt you would get very far with that. plus, while they dont mind coming to the school with this issue, most around here probly wouldnt "snitch" to police
Mar 5, 2013 11:52am
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sleeper

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27,879 posts
Mar 5, 2013 11:59 AM
FatHobbit;1400321 wrote:Public school funding needs a reboot too.
I actually agree with this provided that teachers unions are abolished.
Mar 5, 2013 11:59am