Dear Abby: I am the single dad of two teenage boys (17 and 18) who are both in high school. I am wondering about something they do with their friends. The boys take showers in large groups. When they come in from running or sports, or if a group is spending the night, they shower in groups of two, three or four. It's not like we have a huge shower — it's normal size.
I know there's nothing sexual going on because I can hear them talking and joking around. When I asked the boys about this, they looked at me like I had two heads. They said it was just a social thing and the same as showering together after football in the school gym.
They also "air dry" after showers by walking around in towels, sometimes watching TV or goofing off for hours while in their towels. When going out, they get naked in the bathroom, fixing their hair, shaving, brushing their teeth, etc. It's like a big "nude fest" with them and their friends.
While I'm glad they are comfortable with their bodies and who they are, it still bothers me somewhat. Am I being a prude in thinking this is unusual or inappropriate? — Stumped in Kentucky
Dear Stumped: I see nothing inappropriate about what your sons and their friends are doing. Nor do I want to label you a prude. You are just not as comfortable in your skin as your sons and their "jock" friends are. Is it possible that they take after their mother?
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Wed, Oct 10, 2012 9:57 PM
Oct 10, 2012 9:57 PM
I understand that group showers in school sports is normal after practice or games, but doing the group shower at home in a normal size shower is a little strange to me. I think most schools have separate shower stalls nowadays so every person has their own shower, years ago they all had open showers. I open the newspaper today and read Dear Abby with total amazement that a guy would ask her if he should be concerned that his 17 yr old son and his buddies are taking group showers at his house in a small shower stall, he wanted her advice and she said it was normal, when the hell did it become normal for 4 guys to squeeze in to a shower stall together and start lathering up?
Oct 10, 2012 9:57pm
