Ohio Chatter
Ohio Chatter

Forums

All Threads Serious Business Sports Politics Archive Pick 'ems
Log In Create Account

What would you do if your spouses father was a sex offender?

Home ▸ Archive ▸ Serious Business ▸ What would you do if your spouses father was a sex offender?
gorocks99's avatar

gorocks99

Senior Member

10,760 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:35 AM
Talk to your husband about it. You're married, soooo you shouldn't have a problem discussing (in a mature way) the subject. Don't go at him about it, but maybe start the conversation talking about how you're thinking about your trip to visit his dad and want to know more about him, want to know about his past. If he doesn't give up the information voluntarily, bring up what you found and how you found it. Use it as a discussion and don't go in accusatory. Good luck.
Jun 12, 2012 9:35am
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:37 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196406 wrote:It happened less than 4 years ago. He started his prison sentence June 2008 it says but I believe he was just released within this past year. It was a charge and conviction of raping/molesting under the age of 14.
I think you're justified in wanting to know about it. Assuming your husband knew about it he probably should've told you. Especially since there are apparent plans to visit him in July. I would not be making that trip.
Jun 12, 2012 9:37am
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:37 AM
gorocks99;1196420 wrote:Talk to your husband about it. You're married, soooo you shouldn't have a problem discussing (in a mature way) the subject. Don't go at him about it, but maybe start the conversation talking about how you're thinking about your trip to visit his dad and want to know more about him, want to know about his past. If he doesn't give up the information voluntarily, bring up what you found and how you found it. Use it as a discussion and don't go in accusatory. Good luck.
Best post in the thread so far.
Jun 12, 2012 9:37am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:38 AM
gorocks99;1196420 wrote:Talk to your husband about it. You're married, soooo you shouldn't have a problem discussing (in a mature way) the subject. Don't go at him about it, but maybe start the conversation talking about how you're thinking about your trip to visit his dad and want to know more about him, want to know about his past. If he doesn't give up the information voluntarily, bring up what you found and how you found it. Use it as a discussion and don't go in accusatory. Good luck.
This is how I plan on doing it. I did send him an email asking to explain about his dad with no details. It could be no big deal really but I now have ZERO desire to visit Utah to see him.
Jun 12, 2012 9:38am
Devils Advocate's avatar

Devils Advocate

Brudda o da bomber

4,539 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:39 AM
ernest_t_bass;1196410 wrote:Four years ago? She's 18 now? She hot?
The child could be 6 or seven rocket scientist. This is sick... Even by my standards.
Jun 12, 2012 9:39am
GOONx19's avatar

GOONx19

An exceptional poster.

7,147 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:41 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196426 wrote:This is how I plan on doing it. I did send him an email asking to explain about his dad with no details. It could be no big deal really but I now have ZERO desire to visit Utah to see him.


You sent your husband an email? I'm not married, but this shit seems weird.
Jun 12, 2012 9:41am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:42 AM
justincredible;1196423 wrote:I think you're justified in wanting to know about it. Assuming your husband knew about it he probably should've told you. Especially since there are apparent plans to visit him in July. I would not be making that trip.
It's possible he may not even know. I know he knew he was in jail/prison but who knows what his dad said. It's not like they are close but still I don't want to be in the same room with someone who can do that.
Jun 12, 2012 9:42am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:43 AM
GOONx19;1196434 wrote:
You sent your husband an email? I'm not married, but this **** seems weird.
Yes because he's been out of town for 3 weeks and is out for another 3 weeks. They don't get very good if any cell phone service where they are at in Nevada. I didn't ask him to explain shit I just wanted to know about his dad.
Jun 12, 2012 9:43am
S

Steel Valley Football

Senior Member

4,548 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:48 AM
I'm amazed at some of these responses. You have every right to be concerned about this.
Jun 12, 2012 9:48am
Curly J's avatar

Curly J

Self Pwner in Training.

7,282 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:48 AM
justincredible;1196424 wrote:Best post in the thread so far.

/skyhook'd...Isadore'd...(I'm sorry)
Jun 12, 2012 9:48am
Rotinaj's avatar

Rotinaj

Senior Member

7,699 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:56 AM
No fucking way would i be going to visit that creep. You should definitely say something. Id wait to do it until he got back though. Not really an email/phone convo.
Jun 12, 2012 9:56am
Early Cuyler's avatar

Early Cuyler

Sonny LIED!!!

1,097 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:00 AM
I get all of my advice on how to live life off of Ohio Chatter....smdh
Jun 12, 2012 10:00am
G

gut

Senior Member

15,058 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:03 AM
Next thing she'll tell us is his name is John Smith.
Jun 12, 2012 10:03am
Curly J's avatar

Curly J

Self Pwner in Training.

7,282 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:07 AM
Early Cuyler;1196459 wrote:I get all of my advice on how to live life off of Ohio Chatter....smdh
This is all Minor League advice. We all know that JJ is where you get the Major League advice.

/NCF'd
Jun 12, 2012 10:07am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

Just Ain't Care

11,466 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:08 AM
gut;1196465 wrote:Next thing she'll tell us is his name is John Smith.
haha reps!
Jun 12, 2012 10:08am
BORIStheCrusher's avatar

BORIStheCrusher

drunk

1,893 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:17 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196367 wrote:So I just found this out via google search that he's a registered sex offender in Utah. He never told me and he hasn't seen his father in like 8 or 9 years. He talks to him on occasion. Should I approach the hubs and ask why he never told me or even if he knows?
You never bothered to ask your husband why he hasn't seen his father for so long?
Jun 12, 2012 10:17am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:24 AM
BORIStheCrusher;1196479 wrote:You never bothered to ask your husband why he hasn't seen his father for so long?
I have he said that they don't have much of a relationship. I'm just wondering if something may have happened to him when he was a kid.
Jun 12, 2012 10:24am
Belly35's avatar

Belly35

Elderly Intellectual

9,716 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:24 AM
My first thoughts were why anyone would look up something like this. What the reason to do this? That is your business and reasoning &#8230;</SPAN>

You now know or think you have all the proper information. I would strongly suggest you make sure you have the facts straight before any conversation with your husband begins.</SPAN>

He may not know the facts nor care to know the facts and then again ashamed of this issue within the family. If he is a strong family man this would be difficult for him and hurtful emtionally. Remember as a man that loves you his action to protect you is as difficult to rationalize and the crime that was committed. It seems he is keeping his distance from his dad so you need to not pressure the issue. </SPAN>
Marriage is base on truthfulness however that can be a very frightening endeavor, without have the confidence in each other love to handle the truth it is blind faith. </SPAN>

You need reinforce that you love him, this could very much bring you both closer and take a burden off his mind, letting him to move forward and developing a stronger trust base marriage. </SPAN>
Jun 12, 2012 10:24am
Belly35's avatar

Belly35

Elderly Intellectual

9,716 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:26 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196490 wrote:I have he said that they don't have much of a relationship. I'm just wondering if something may have happened to him when he was a kid.
Don't built something that isn't there ..... wait an see
This is a issue between him and his dad .... you are just a support player.
Jun 12, 2012 10:26am
sleeper's avatar

sleeper

Legend

27,879 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:31 AM
This is exhibit A of why women don't post here.

If it really bothers you, you can always ask him about it. I'm not sure email was the best way to bring it up however.
Jun 12, 2012 10:31am
T

Thinthickbigred

Senior Member

4,148 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:32 AM
Commander of Awesome;1196371 wrote:Getting advice from strangers on the message board is the best way to approach this.
LOL that or Dear Abby
Jun 12, 2012 10:32am
DeyDurkie5's avatar

DeyDurkie5

Senior Member

11,324 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:34 AM
ga fuq
Jun 12, 2012 10:34am
T

Thinthickbigred

Senior Member

4,148 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:37 AM
Honestly if the man hasnt spoken to his father in 9 years chances are he knows and or he was also abused .
Jun 12, 2012 10:37am
Fab4Runner's avatar

Fab4Runner

Tits McGee

6,196 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:45 AM
You guys are a bunch of assholes.

Based on the information you have given, you have every right to ask your husband about this. That doesn't mean accuse, start an argument, etc. But if you are planning to go see this man in July, I believe you should have your questions answered beforehand. It's unfortunate that your husband did not tell you any of this, but I am guessing he was probably embarrassed and ashamed...who could blame him? I can understand him wanting to keep this buried, but since you guys are planning a trip he shouldn't be upset that you want to know about the person you are going to see.
Jun 12, 2012 10:45am
se-alum's avatar

se-alum

The Biggest Boss

13,948 posts
Jun 12, 2012 10:51 AM
If he knew, he absolutely should've told you about it.
Jun 12, 2012 10:51am