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What would you do if your spouses father was a sex offender?

Home ▸ Archive ▸ Serious Business ▸ What would you do if your spouses father was a sex offender?
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

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2,295 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:12 AM
So I just found this out via google search that he's a registered sex offender in Utah. He never told me and he hasn't seen his father in like 8 or 9 years. He talks to him on occasion. Should I approach the hubs and ask why he never told me or even if he knows?
Jun 12, 2012 9:12am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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23,151 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:15 AM
Getting advice from strangers on the message board is the best way to approach this.
Jun 12, 2012 9:15am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

Just Ain't Care

11,466 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:15 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196367 wrote:So I just found this out via google search that he's a registered sex offender in Utah. He never told me and he hasn't seen his father in like 8 or 9 years. He talks to him on occasion. Should I approach the hubs and ask why he never told me or even if he knows?
What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
Jun 12, 2012 9:15am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

Just Ain't Care

11,466 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:16 AM
Also - this isn't a personal attack but women always start things over dumb shit. He hasn't seen his father in a decade, so clearly he's threat to your children...
Jun 12, 2012 9:16am
like_that's avatar

like_that

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Jun 12, 2012 9:17 AM
Raw Dawgin' it;1196372 wrote:What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
My thoughts exactly. Typical women trying to make it about herself.

He probably hasn't told you, because it is one of his few skeletons in the closet that he isn't proud of.
Jun 12, 2012 9:17am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

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Jun 12, 2012 9:17 AM
Raw Dawgin' it;1196372 wrote:What's the point? why do you care he didn't yell you? sounds like you're just trying to pick a fight because he didn't tell you something that makes no difference to your relationship.
I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
Jun 12, 2012 9:17am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

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Jun 12, 2012 9:19 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196376 wrote:I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
If you pee near a playground and get caught you register as a sex offender. Maybe you shouldn't assume he fucked little kids...
Jun 12, 2012 9:19am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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Jun 12, 2012 9:19 AM
Well if he hasn't seen his dad in a decade he may not know. You don't have kids, why do you gaf? You wouldn't visit your HUSBAND's father because he was a sex offender. Glad you're so high and mighty.
Jun 12, 2012 9:19am
ernest_t_bass's avatar

ernest_t_bass

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24,984 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:20 AM
Hubs? You married now?
Jun 12, 2012 9:20am
FatHobbit's avatar

FatHobbit

Senior Member

8,651 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:21 AM
Idk, I think that's something you have to disclose to your spouse. Unless it was a bogus charge where he was peeing in public or something like that.
Jun 12, 2012 9:21am
like_that's avatar

like_that

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Jun 12, 2012 9:21 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196376 wrote:I'm not trying to pick a fight at all. I'm not mad. I'm just wondering why anyone would even talk to a father who did this. Just curious because we may go to Utah to see him in July.
If your "HUBBY" wants to discuss it, he will.

/thread
Jun 12, 2012 9:21am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

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Jun 12, 2012 9:22 AM
Raw Dawgin' it;1196381 wrote:If you pee near a playground and get caught you register as a sex offender. Maybe you shouldn't assume he ****ed little kids...
Well I looked up the document. He was charged and convicted with raping someone under the age of 14 and I know he was in prison.
Jun 12, 2012 9:22am
A PAC's avatar

A PAC

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144 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:22 AM
Maybe this is the reason he doesn't speak with his father. Maybe it's a sore subject wih him. Either way, it doesn't sound like your children ever have to interact with him thank God.
Jun 12, 2012 9:22am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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Jun 12, 2012 9:22 AM
ernest_t_bass;1196385 wrote:Hubs? You married now?
Oh you didn't know? She only brings it up in EVERY single one of her posts.
Jun 12, 2012 9:22am
FatHobbit's avatar

FatHobbit

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Jun 12, 2012 9:22 AM
Commander of Awesome;1196383 wrote:Well if he hasn't seen his dad in a decade he may not know.
Good point
Jun 12, 2012 9:22am
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Jun 12, 2012 9:24 AM
FatHobbit;1196387 wrote:Idk, I think that's something you have to disclose to your spouse. Unless it was a bogus charge where he was peeing in public or something like that.
Absolutely. And even if it was a bogus charge. If it's a bogus charge it's no big deal so just get it out of the way. If it was a more serious charge then it's a much bigger deal, especially if there is still contact. I don't know, it's just something I'd rather find out from my spouse than stumble upon it accidentally.
Jun 12, 2012 9:24am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

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Jun 12, 2012 9:24 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196390 wrote:Well I looked up the document. He was charged and convicted with raping someone under the age of 14 and I know he was in prison.
How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
Jun 12, 2012 9:24am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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Jun 12, 2012 9:27 AM
justincredible;1196397 wrote:Absolutely. And even if it was a bogus charge. If it's a bogus charge it's no big deal so just get it out of the way. If it was a more serious charge then it's a much bigger deal, especially if there is still contact. I don't know, it's just something I'd rather find out from my spouse than stumble upon it accidentally.
Exactly, she already knew she was going to bring it up, she was looking for justification.

Also doesn't sound like it was "accidentally" to me.
Jun 12, 2012 9:27am
FatHobbit's avatar

FatHobbit

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Jun 12, 2012 9:28 AM
Raw Dawgin' it;1196398 wrote:How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
ummmm, unless he was fifteen when it happened, I don't think a fourteen year old can "cry wolf"
Jun 12, 2012 9:28am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

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Jun 12, 2012 9:28 AM
Raw Dawgin' it;1196398 wrote:How old was he when he did it? Honestly, if it hasn't come up it sounds like a non issue. Girls never cry wolf when they wake up the next morning and realized they had sex with someone they didn't want to.
It happened less than 4 years ago. He started his prison sentence June 2008 it says but I believe he was just released within this past year. It was a charge and conviction of raping/molesting under the age of 14.
Jun 12, 2012 9:28am
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

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Jun 12, 2012 9:29 AM
Commander of Awesome;1196401 wrote:Exactly, she already knew she was going to bring it up, she was looking for justification.

Also doesn't sound like it was "accidentally" to me.
They have the same name so when you google one it links to the other.
Jun 12, 2012 9:29am
ernest_t_bass's avatar

ernest_t_bass

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Jun 12, 2012 9:30 AM
Four years ago? She's 18 now? She hot?
Jun 12, 2012 9:30am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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Jun 12, 2012 9:31 AM
Ytowngirlinfla;1196408 wrote:They have the same name so when you google one it links to the other.
You have an excuse with information you leave out in the initial post for everything.
Jun 12, 2012 9:31am
Commander of Awesome's avatar

Commander of Awesome

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Jun 12, 2012 9:32 AM
Same name huh? Was your spouse's father the fall guy?
Jun 12, 2012 9:32am
Raw Dawgin' it's avatar

Raw Dawgin' it

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Jun 12, 2012 9:35 AM
FatHobbit;1196405 wrote:ummmm, unless he was fifteen when it happened, I don't think a fourteen year old can "cry wolf"
Was more of a general statement.

Since it happened recently i think it's serious that he did it, but if he hasn't seen him in a decade i don't think it's something you need to bring up with him. If the situation arises where you need to know he'll tell you.
Jun 12, 2012 9:35am