I usually know better to bring personal life stories on here but I'll try again and try not to come off as bias like I'm automatically right.

I have a girlfriend who I've been dating for about...two-three months now. She's got some personal issues going on at her house (which is 30 minutes away for the record) I won't get into the issues because they're complicated and irrelevant to this story but basically she's going through a divorce. So when we're not out doing stuff, then she always comes over here -- I've never been to her house. She's expressed a couple times she sometimes gets annoyed by doing all the driving. Towards the end of December these divorce issues should be resolved and then I'll be able to go there and create more of a balance, but I digress... So I've offered to meet her halfway or whatever and we've done that once or twice, but usually she'll just not have me bother and do the drive herself. She's over here...three times a week, tops. To me, a half hour drive isn't a big deal. I've dated numerous girls that lived in that 20-25 minute range away and I would do a lot of the driving. I even dated a girl in BGSU and 2-3 times a month I'd make that 250 mile roundtrip to see her.
When I invite her over, I make sure there's several hours she can be here so it doesn't feel like she drives and then leaves. We're not at the "staying over" point yet so that's out of the question.

So that's the background. Tonight, she was working a double (she's a nurse at the hospital) and she asked if I'd bring her food on my way home from school. She tried to reason that it was on my way home (driving to the hospital would actually add 30-40 minutes to my already 45 minute commute) Perhaps this is me being whiny/selfish (I would argue at least I'm not whipped) but I basically told her I'm not driving the extra distance to see her for a little bit of time. I had been at school all day and had to be back at 8am the next morning. Plus, she's a fucking nurse. It's not like she can step away for an hour lunch. If things started to get crazy when I got there, then guess what, she'd have to do some work and not see me. Eventually it became about just seeing me, not about any dinner (even though we're hanging out tomorrow night).

So now she's super pissed. She's putting in all the effort and not sure if she's getting an equal return from me. She said this instance wasn't the breaking point, that I had done this before. When I asked for specific examples, she couldn't list any so take that for what it's worth. The damn thing about is when she originally suggested this, I asked her how much I'd actually see her, and she got kinda snippy and told me to just forget it. So then later I said, 'Okay I'll bring you chipotle, is that good?' and for the second or third time she said it wasnt necessary and she was fine. Okay, so what else can I do??? When I brought that up later, she said she thought I was joking because I often say things like that in a joking manner (she has a point there, but I gave her no reason to believe I was joking this time)

IMO, she's being completely unresonable. I would NEVER expect her to come over if it meant hanging out for an hour or so. But I'm bringing this up anyways to see. Maybe I was selfish.
It's one of those situations where if I would have just sacked up and accepted it as a downfall of dating, I'd be her hero and in her good graces for a while. But since I didn't, now she's debating the relationship and blah blah blah.

Call your girlfriend while she is working and tell her you're banging her sister.

Art Modell;559874 wrote:Call your girlfriend while she is working and tell her you're banging her sister.

I did that already. It didn't help. Next.

Honestly, it sounds to me like the point of the exercise was to see if you were into her enough to make what to you would have been a sacrifice. At least to her you failed, thus the consequences. Dangerous are those ladies going through divorces. Tread carefully.

I don't think there is any correct answer. Women don't even know what they want themselves, how the hell is a guy supposed to know? You might as well get used to it.

ytownfootball;559880 wrote: Dangerous are all ladies going through anything. Tread carefully.

Fixed.

Are you her first post divorce relationship?

Run while you still can! Womyn are stoopid! Only good for humping!

Epic Fail, dude.

Her point of view - "I'm always driving over to his place. I ask him -just once- to do the driving while -I'm- stuck at work, and he bails" . Telling her you were willing to drive 250 to see another woman certainly didn't help your cause.

She ain't debating the relationship - she's just figuring out which other guy to take up with after she dumps you.

cut her loose man

4RINGZ - No, she was briefly with a guy last Summer, but it didn't get far. I suppose I'm the first serious bit of dating she's had since.

Cat Flood - I don't consider it bailing. I'm trying to be reasonable. I don't expect her to drive over here when she spends more time driving than she does with me. What's the point otherwise? And it's not like this was a rare opportunity to see each other. We hung out Friday and will tomorrow. To me, it came off as "Hey, drive an extra 30 miles to see me for maybe 15 minutes." -- probably, maybe that's just one of those things girls do to be girls. And FWIW, I never told her about my past history of driving all those miles.

What type of environment does she work in at the hospital?

That route and your reasoning for it makes perfect sense and might be your best bet. I've actually done that to a few people. They'd get me food and I just end up finding it later in the break room with my name on it. And I'm just a bitch PCA that technically has no responsibility.

You work in a hospital as a PCA? What is that -- I'm not familiar with it. I work in one as a PCT.
She works in your standard telemetry unit -- assigned to 4-5 patients. By the time I'd get there, it'd be near 7pm and dayshift would be leaving and night-shift would be coming on. Obviously she'd be staying but it's still hard to find time away at shift change.

friendfromlowry;559864I have a girlfriend who I've been dating for about...two-three months now....... She's got some personal issues going on at her house she's going through a divorce........ Towards the end of December these divorce issues should be resolved[/QUOTE wrote:
Are you that stupid? She is legally still married, already had a relationship with someone (while still married) and is demanding. Never get involved with a married woman ever, unless it is for just a roll in the hay. It is dangerous, it most always ends badly, and she needs to let some time go buy.

Unless she is the head nurse and really good at it, run.

friendfromlowry;559927 wrote:4RINGZ

Cat Flood - I don't consider it bailing. I'm trying to be reasonable. I don't expect her to drive over here when she spends more time driving than she does with me. What's the point otherwise? And it's not like this was a rare opportunity to see each other. We hung out Friday and will tomorrow. To me, it came off as "Hey, drive an extra 30 miles to see me for maybe 15 minutes." -- probably, maybe that's just one of those things girls do to be girls. And FWIW, I never told her about my past history of driving all those miles.

I know, I know The epic fail is using reason with a woman in the middle of a divorce. Hang in there!

Bigdogg - you're not understanding the situation, I left a lot out mainly because it doesn't contribute to the current predicament. If you can reason that she's overly-demanding from given information....then I'd probably agree, but it has nothing to do with still being married and needing time to go by. There's more to it than that. She's not still legally married.

Yeah I heard from Courtney -- went running there last week and saw for myself. What's the reasoning? She said that's where the new soccer field is going? If so, then why did they eliminate the other prairie and put in all those soccer fields? Will this new one be where the high school team plays its games??

friendfromlowry;559864 wrote:I usually know better to bring personal life stories on here but I'll try again and try not to come off as bias like I'm automatically right.

I have a girlfriend who I've been dating for about...two-three months now. She's got some personal issues going on at her house (which is 30 minutes away for the record) I won't get into the issues because they're complicated and irrelevant to this story but basically she's going through a divorce.

Wow... that pretty much says it all... messing with a MARRIED woman. DUMB!

ccrunner609;560002 wrote:who knows....the soccer is started to really piss me off. They suck and dont need 6 million acres.

Wow! That's a lot of acres!

Scarlet_Buckeye;560005 wrote:Wow... that pretty much says it all... messing with a MARRIED woman. DUMB!

She's not married. I'm not 'messing around with anyone's wife in secrecy' -- if that was the case I wouldn't bring it up.

friendfromlowry;560031 wrote:She's not married. I'm not 'messing around with anyone's wife in secrecy' -- if that was the case I wouldn't bring it up.

If the divorce isn't final, she's married.

tk421;560042 wrote:If the divorce isn't final, she's married.

WTH?? You can type WORDS?? I thought all you were good for is posting pics! Go back to your other job son. I keed!

Stiffman;560048 wrote:WTH?? You can type WORDS?? I thought all you were good for is posting pics! Go back to your other job son. I keed!

ha ha, I haven't posted a pic for a few days. I'll have to fix that later tonight.

Women aren't reasonable. If you're serious about going through this charade until you find out she is still fucking her husband, then you should have bit the bullet and driven out there. If you aren't serious about it, then who gives a fuck if she is pissed?