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Funny metaphors

Home ▸ Archive ▸ Serious Business ▸ Funny metaphors
wes_mantooth's avatar

wes_mantooth

Tomfoolery & shenanigans

17,977 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:02 PM
The reds dot com thread got me thinking about some funny metaphors....list em.

I'd like to bang her like a screen door in a hurricane.
I'm out like a fat kid in dodgeball.
Sep 29, 2010 5:02pm
T

Timber

Senior Member

935 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:07 PM
Foghorn Leghorn: "I say, that boy is about as quiet as a caterpiller in a moss patch with his tennis shoes on... sneakers that is."
Sep 29, 2010 5:07pm
karen lotz's avatar

karen lotz

TuTu Train

22,284 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:10 PM
I'm out like a boner in sweatpants.
Sep 29, 2010 5:10pm
j_crazy's avatar

j_crazy

7 gram rocks. how i roll.

8,372 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:11 PM
like a monkey fucking a skunk, i've had enough.
Sep 29, 2010 5:11pm
karen lotz's avatar

karen lotz

TuTu Train

22,284 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:11 PM
I'm gonna beat him like a rented mule.
Sep 29, 2010 5:11pm
gorocks99's avatar

gorocks99

Senior Member

10,760 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:14 PM
For crossing the street:

Lets make like Jesus and cross
Sep 29, 2010 5:14pm
wes_mantooth's avatar

wes_mantooth

Tomfoolery & shenanigans

17,977 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:17 PM
From The Naked Gun..

Like a midget at a urinal....I was going to have to stay on my toes.
Sep 29, 2010 5:17pm
T

Timber

Senior Member

935 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:19 PM
I'm off like a prom dress!
Sep 29, 2010 5:19pm
karen lotz's avatar

karen lotz

TuTu Train

22,284 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:22 PM
Snot loves penis like a fat kid loves cake.
Sep 29, 2010 5:22pm
karen lotz's avatar

karen lotz

TuTu Train

22,284 posts
Sep 29, 2010 5:24 PM
I could probably list just about any Lil Wayne lyrics and there will be some interesting ones in there.
Sep 29, 2010 5:24pm
Little Danny's avatar

Little Danny

Senior Member

4,288 posts
Sep 29, 2010 6:31 PM
My granmother used to have one: She called me everything but a white woman.
Sep 29, 2010 6:31pm
R

rugbywrestler

Senior Member

462 posts
Sep 29, 2010 9:22 PM
Lets bounce like double Ds
Sep 29, 2010 9:22pm
1_beast's avatar

1_beast

Senior Member

5,642 posts
Sep 29, 2010 9:34 PM
this looks like a bunch of monkeys trying to fuck a football.....

colder than a well diggers ass

colder than a witches tit in a brass bra

shivering like a dog shittin razor blades

hotter than a 2 dollar whore on nickle night
Sep 29, 2010 9:34pm
gorocks99's avatar

gorocks99

Senior Member

10,760 posts
Sep 29, 2010 9:45 PM
Sweating like a whore in church
Sep 29, 2010 9:45pm
B

bigkahuna

Senior Member

4,454 posts
Sep 29, 2010 11:57 PM
You guys do realize that these are all similes right?
Sep 29, 2010 11:57pm
B

bigkahuna

Senior Member

4,454 posts
Sep 29, 2010 11:59 PM
She's the town bike
Sep 29, 2010 11:59pm
redfalcon's avatar

redfalcon

Senior Member

1,088 posts
Sep 30, 2010 12:58 AM
Sweating like a priest at a little league game
Out like a one legged man in a butt kicking contest
In response to Having fun yet? More fun than I can have without being forced to cuddle afterwards.
Sep 30, 2010 12:58am
I

I Wear Pants

Senior Member

16,223 posts
Sep 30, 2010 1:47 AM
These aren't metaphors.
Sep 30, 2010 1:47am
THE4RINGZ's avatar

THE4RINGZ

R.I.P Thread Bomber

16,816 posts
Sep 30, 2010 7:12 AM
Shivering like a dog trying to shit out a peach seed.

Sweating like a pregnant nun at confession.
Sep 30, 2010 7:12am
B

bigkahuna

Senior Member

4,454 posts
Sep 30, 2010 10:28 AM
IWP, I already told them that.

Mine, while weak, is the only true metaphor on here.
Sep 30, 2010 10:28am