The Most Painfully Annoying Business Expressions

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C

Con_Alma

Senior Member

12,198 posts
Dec 21, 2009 1:50 PM
http://www.forbes.com/2009/12/16/annoying-business-jargon-entrepreneurs-management-jargon.html

Some of these are dead on.

"Take It To The Next Level"

In theory, this means to make something better. In practice, "the phrase means absolutely nothing," says Laurent Duperval, who runs an eponymous consulting company in Quebec. "Nobody knows what the next level actually looks like, so how am I supposed to know when I've reached it?"
Dec 21, 2009 1:50pm
gorocks99's avatar

gorocks99

Senior Member

10,760 posts
Dec 21, 2009 1:53 PM
Circle back ... yes. Out of pocket ... yes. Low-hanging fruit ... yes.

Lets see, what else ...

"PTO"
"EOD"
"Key insights"

There are more, I can't think of them right now b/c my head is filled with useless jargon.
Dec 21, 2009 1:53pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:03 PM
I hate pretty much any business expression and acronyms.
Dec 21, 2009 2:03pm
Q

queencitybuckeye

Senior Member

7,117 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:12 PM
Everything being a "system". The construction industry is particularly guilty here. Some joists with plywood and carpet laid across them is not a "flooring system", it's a fucking floor.

Also, using nouns as verbs, as in "I'll effort to get those to you tomorrow". What's wrong with the correct word, such as "try"?
Dec 21, 2009 2:12pm
C

Con_Alma

Senior Member

12,198 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:30 PM
nouns as a verb....google. :)
Dec 21, 2009 2:30pm
Little Danny's avatar

Little Danny

Senior Member

4,288 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:52 PM
One used quite frequently in my office is when someone leaves a mass email will go around "wishing that person well in their future endevours".

Why don't they just say what they really mean and say "Don't let the door hit you in the arse on the way out?"
Dec 21, 2009 2:52pm
P

Polar Bear 73

Senior Member

216 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:55 PM
"Thinking outside the box". I heard some comedian say, "if you are truly thinking outside the box, why does it have to be a box".

Another favorite that I hear at almost every staff meeting, "let's take this offline".
Dec 21, 2009 2:55pm
Curly J's avatar

Curly J

Self Pwner in Training.

7,282 posts
Dec 21, 2009 2:57 PM
Famous line where I work is "Make it happen".
Dec 21, 2009 2:57pm
mucalum49's avatar

mucalum49

Senior Member

1,639 posts
Dec 21, 2009 3:04 PM
The list is pretty accurate but the reader comments had my two favorites "touch base" or the business/multi-use "it is what it is".

Sadly in my MBA classes I hear a lot of these regularly.
Dec 21, 2009 3:04pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Dec 21, 2009 3:08 PM
"It is what it is" makes me want to stab myself in the ear. My wife hears one all the time at work that I have luckily never heard or I would kill myself: "the net net of it."
Dec 21, 2009 3:08pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Dec 21, 2009 3:09 PM
These expressions play a very large role in my quest to get out of the corporate world.
Dec 21, 2009 3:09pm
tsst_fballfan's avatar

tsst_fballfan

Senior Member

406 posts
Dec 21, 2009 3:23 PM
synergies
right sizing
Dec 21, 2009 3:23pm
xnds1fan's avatar

xnds1fan

Senior Member

442 posts
Dec 21, 2009 4:23 PM
"World Class"
Dec 21, 2009 4:23pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Dec 21, 2009 4:25 PM
downsizing........
Dec 21, 2009 4:25pm
I

I Wear Pants

Senior Member

16,223 posts
Dec 21, 2009 4:51 PM
gorocks99 wrote: Circle back ... yes. Out of pocket ... yes. Low-hanging fruit ... yes.

Lets see, what else ...

"PTO"
"EOD"
"Key insights"

There are more, I can't think of them right now b/c my head is filled with useless jargon.
I thought low-hanging fruit was just an economic principle.
Dec 21, 2009 4:51pm
D

Def Leopard

Senior Member

176 posts
Dec 21, 2009 4:51 PM
One that I hear almost daily is "moving forward".
Dec 21, 2009 4:51pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Dec 21, 2009 4:53 PM
My most hated acronym:

SLA

Die in a fire, SLA's.
Dec 21, 2009 4:53pm
O-Trap's avatar

O-Trap

Chief Shenanigans Officer

14,994 posts
Dec 21, 2009 5:09 PM
Skill set
Level of experience
"Shake hands and kiss babies"
CPM (If CPM were a person, I'd kill it in the nuts.)
Paradigm shift
Key demographic
Business model
Went a different direction
In the red
In the black

What is most sad is that I've already caught myself saying these from time to time, because I hear them so often. Grrrrrr.
Dec 21, 2009 5:09pm
M

Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Dec 21, 2009 5:12 PM
Polar Bear 73 wrote: "Thinking outside the box". I heard some comedian say, "if you are truly thinking outside the box, why does it have to be a box".
This, such a stupid concept. I'm surprised it didn't make Forbes' list.
Dec 21, 2009 5:12pm
F

fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Dec 21, 2009 5:45 PM
Synergies.
Right-sizing
Realigning expectations in light of the difficult economic environment
Unprecedented events of the past year
Incentivizing
Aligning capacity to reflect forseeable demand
Dec 21, 2009 5:45pm
M

Manhattan Buckeye

Senior Member

7,566 posts
Dec 21, 2009 5:51 PM
^^^^

adding one more:

"we are not immune to the effects of the current global economy"
Dec 21, 2009 5:51pm
believer's avatar

believer

Senior Member

8,153 posts
Dec 21, 2009 7:15 PM
Due to the economy we've had to right-size the organization by tapping into key synergies that will be discussed in-depth off-line by key players going forward.

I cringe every time I hear this nonsense, but it is what it is! lol
Dec 21, 2009 7:15pm
Cleveland Buck's avatar

Cleveland Buck

Troll Hunter

5,126 posts
Dec 21, 2009 8:09 PM
I say 'it is what it is' several times a week when I'm trying to sell some equipment. It means nothing, but most of what I'm saying doesn't mean anything, I'm just trying to make them feel comfortable enough to send my boss a $20,000 check without even seeing what they are getting first.
Dec 21, 2009 8:09pm
darbypitcher22's avatar

darbypitcher22

Senior Member

8,000 posts
Dec 21, 2009 8:13 PM
pretty nice list there
Dec 21, 2009 8:13pm
C

captain_obvious

Member

82 posts
Dec 21, 2009 8:17 PM
my favorite: "Punt" This was a reply from a higher up that had no answer. He probably should have replyed "run away", as he was no help and just hid from the issue with the salesmen out on a limb all by himself.
Dec 21, 2009 8:17pm