Those woman head games where they say one thing and mean another don't bother me. I know what they mean to say. I'll just never let them know that. Playing dumb always leaves an excuse to use during the ensuing argument.

"Do these jeans make my butt look big???"

AAAAHHHHGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the tips on making a sammich. I strive to make the best sammich ever.

So, Mayo is good. Mustard is ok, but, not touching the cheese.

So, Mayo touching the cheese must be ok.

Got it!!!

Always being late for everything

v_falcons wrote: hey , PMS is an excuse! I'd choose the FLU over that any day!!

the thing is, you pretty much know the exact day when its going to happen unlike the flu. yet women still are completely unprepared everytime it comes around....i wonder why? its a cop out females use and its a huge conspiracy!

Mooney44Cards wrote: I hate when they move your stuff in the name of "cleaning" then never tell you where they put it. Then they get pissed at you when you can't find your shit. Half the time THEY don't even know where they put it.

I thought it was just something my mom did when I was growing up. Now after living with 2 different girlfriends I see that's its a universal female thing.

Well, if you're like my dad, his definition of "where it belongs" is "the last place he left it, regardless of how little sense that location may make". This even pisses me off.

Only 5% of women actually experience symptoms of PMS: Fact!


My pet peeve is women go to vote and act like they are doing their American duty. Little do they know, their American duty is to be in the kitchen cooking and cleaning.

Women are indecisive. Well, at least my ex was. Drove me absolutely nuts. I'm a simple man, if I ask you a simple question...I expect a simple answer and vice versa. Example:

Her: Which outfit/earrings/shoes/food choice/meaningless life decision/ do you like honey?
Me: Ummm...I like the black dress
Her: Why? You don't like the blue one?
Me: Yea I do, but black looks nice, plus it was the first one you picked up
Her: But blue is your fav color! What's wrong with blue?
Me: Nothing! I just happen to like the black on right now
Her: Right now? What about tomorrow?
Me: Nothing is wrong with the blue dress....I just like the black one, please just put on the dress, we are going to be late
Her: Well, you're not giving me an encouraging answer, which one?
Me: WTF woman! I just told you why I like it!
Her: Yea...but you didn't tell me why you liked it...
Me: I can tell you that I don't like you right now....jeez

Ladies...guys don't give a flying fock what color dress/earrings/or shoes you wear. Just don't look trashy when we want you to look pretty, and don't talk when we want you to STFU. Simple as that.

Here is a serious one.

Why do women insist on telling us about their dreams? My GF does this all the time, and it is really the only thing she does that grinds my gears.

Another example...talking about meaningless crap during any sporting event. My ex was NOTORIOUS for doing that. Her excuse "Well, I don't understand the game. so I have to ask questions!" So I bought her the book written by Holly Robinson Peete, which she never read...

"Why are their jerseys that color?"
"LOL, their coach is ooollllllddddd"

1. Way to emotional
2. Talk during the game
3. Asking stupid questions during game
4. Not enjoying said game
5. But still wanting to go to game

Keebler wrote:

v_falcons wrote:

Keebler wrote:

v_falcons wrote: LOL do you actually say that to her?

No, she would kick my ass.

LOL..

I'm not joking. She would literally kick my ass.

I bet she calls you her BOY!

you guys are funny

dancinbear wrote: you guys are funny

Who let you out of the kitchen?

When you don't answer your phone the first time and she keeps repeatedly calling and calling.

raiderbuck wrote: Another example...talking about meaningless crap during any sporting event. My ex was NOTORIOUS for doing that. Her excuse "Well, I don't understand the game. so I have to ask questions!" So I bought her the book written by Holly Robinson Peete, which she never read...

"Why are their jerseys that color?"
"LOL, their coach is ooollllllddddd"

See you didn't realize this was a test. She was trying to find out how important she was to you. She sees you focused like a laser beam on your favorite sporting event. She remembers how you told her she was the most important thing in her life. "Baby its 4th and goal, the bucks are going for it. Touchdown!" You celebrate. "Ok, what were you saying baby."

You just got an F.

Breathing

Here's one...

When you want to complain about something, or share something with them, the first thing out of their mouth is something "negative," like "why didn't you do this," or "I agree with (the other) person." Instead of, "I'm sorry, honey."

tk421 wrote:

dancinbear wrote: you guys are funny

Who let you out of the kitchen?

Wi-Fi

majorspark wrote: See you didn't realize this was a test. She was trying to find out how important she was to you. She sees you focused like a laser beam on your favorite sporting event. She remembers how you told her she was the most important thing in her life. "Baby its 4th and goal, the bucks are going for it. Touchdown!" You celebrate. "Ok, what were you saying baby."

You just got an F.

I never tried to pass this test. She would know I'm onto her games, and unless it is an emergency I will never break my focus from the game for her inane conversation.

dancinbear wrote:

tk421 wrote:

dancinbear wrote: you guys are funny

Who let you out of the kitchen?

Wi-Fi

Are the cookies done yet? We require sustenance.

EVERYTHING. That is why I only associate with males

majorspark wrote:

raiderbuck wrote: Another example...talking about meaningless crap during any sporting event. My ex was NOTORIOUS for doing that. Her excuse "Well, I don't understand the game. so I have to ask questions!" So I bought her the book written by Holly Robinson Peete, which she never read...

"Why are their jerseys that color?"
"LOL, their coach is ooollllllddddd"

See you didn't realize this was a test. She was trying to find out how important she was to you. She sees you focused like a laser beam on your favorite sporting event. She remembers how you told her she was the most important thing in her life. "Baby its 4th and goal, the bucks are going for it. Touchdown!" You celebrate. "Ok, what were you saying baby."

You just got an F.

hahaha, probably. But hell, "tests" are another pet peeve. She knows I love sports, especially football. I don't hit her with random questions when she's watching Top Model. I don't care, that's what she likes then so be it. lol.

raiderbuck wrote:

majorspark wrote:

raiderbuck wrote: Another example...talking about meaningless crap during any sporting event. My ex was NOTORIOUS for doing that. Her excuse "Well, I don't understand the game. so I have to ask questions!" So I bought her the book written by Holly Robinson Peete, which she never read...

"Why are their jerseys that color?"
"LOL, their coach is ooollllllddddd"

See you didn't realize this was a test. She was trying to find out how important she was to you. She sees you focused like a laser beam on your favorite sporting event. She remembers how you told her she was the most important thing in her life. "Baby its 4th and goal, the bucks are going for it. Touchdown!" You celebrate. "Ok, what were you saying baby."

You just got an F.

hahaha, probably. But hell, "tests" are another pet peeve. She knows I love sports, especially football. I don't hit her with random questions when she's watching Top Model. I don't care, that's what she likes then so be it. lol.

I speak from experience. Never have passed this test. Although some of the male judges on Top Model may.

ohiotiger33 wrote: Here is a serious one.

Why do women insist on telling us about their dreams? My GF does this all the time, and it is really the only thing she does that grinds my gears.

You haven't lived until you've had a girl mad at you for three days because you yelled at her, slapped her, or cheated on her.....IN A DREAM!