Trial Separation

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redstreak one's avatar

redstreak one

Senior Member

1,152 posts
Jul 27, 2011 1:33 PM
I have told my wife the only way I am leaving our house is in a body bag! No one will keep me away from my children everyday of the rest of my life. While we have had our problems, we are getting stronger because we love each other and understand that WE are whats best for our children. I agree with the others, I wouldnt be the one leaving the house.
Jul 27, 2011 1:33pm
Cleveland Buck's avatar

Cleveland Buck

Troll Hunter

5,126 posts
Jul 27, 2011 1:39 PM
Cover your ass, hide your money, and don't move out. Let her move out if she wants to. Call a lawyer. See what he suggests you do so you are looked upon more favorably in custody hearings. If you going to go out and get some strange pussy, don't tell her (or anyone) about it.
Jul 27, 2011 1:39pm
J

JU-ICE

Senior Member

259 posts
Jul 27, 2011 1:46 PM
Do not move out and if she decides to leave, call your attorney ASAP and file residency papers for your kids. The Court will not give you custody if you are living with a friend and same for her. Like the other poster said, be on the offensive, you have no idea what she is thinking/planning and need to protect yourself and your children. I have been through this and she moved out, I have custody of the kids and recieve child support from her.
Jul 27, 2011 1:46pm
Belly35's avatar

Belly35

Elderly Intellectual

9,716 posts
Jul 27, 2011 1:50 PM
the problem here is if you agree to this "trial separation" then if it come to a divorce you have no grounds for anything. You are fucked

She cheating ... with your approval ... What kind of plan is that for you mofo

If the kids are important to you ...you better rethink "trail separation" as an opintion.
Jul 27, 2011 1:50pm
majorspark's avatar

majorspark

Senior Member

5,122 posts
Jul 27, 2011 1:59 PM
My dad went through this prior to my parents divorce. You can see the recurring theme many of the posters here have stressed. DO NOT LEAVE YOUR HOME AND CHILDREN. If she wants to leave so be it. My mom wanted the party life and Dad held is ground. He was not about to loose us along with his wife. She left and he was all over securing custody of his children. Dad got custody of his three children ages 3-9-11. We grew up with him and saw Mom every other weekend and alternating holidays and birthdays.

As an adult myself and my brothers relationship with my Dad is much closer than to our mother. It cost my Mom alot. Also you don't want your wife remarrying some fucktard who is able to spend more time with your children than you are able to because you ex is the custodial parent.
Jul 27, 2011 1:59pm
F

fan_from_texas

Senior Member

2,693 posts
Jul 27, 2011 2:14 PM
A separation, under the watchful eye of a mental health professional, can be very helpful and is one way to save a marriage. That doesn't seem like what you're describing.

From the sound of it, she wants out, and there's not likely to be a whole lot you can do about it. You can work with a counselor individually, and perhaps suggest that she give it a shot. If her objection is that it's expensive and a waste of time, it's worth noting that counseling is much cheaper than divorce.
Jul 27, 2011 2:14pm
E

earwig

huh?

34 posts
Jul 27, 2011 3:04 PM
Open a checking account in your name only and have your direct deposit from work go to this account. Do NOT open this account in a bank where you have other accounts/joint accounts. Whatever joint accounts you have with her take out half of what ever is there. Cancel any joint credit cards and don't let her run up cc debt in your name.

She wants the trial separation so she moves out, not you. Arrange for daycare for kids while you are at work if you don't have it already.
Jul 27, 2011 3:04pm
T

thavoice

Senior Member

14,376 posts
Jul 27, 2011 3:12 PM
If he should move out, would you all advise him to make sure the utilities are switched into her name? I know some, like DP&L power, start to report to the credit agencies if you are slow to payment.
Jul 27, 2011 3:12pm
se-alum's avatar

se-alum

The Biggest Boss

13,948 posts
Jul 27, 2011 3:40 PM
earwig;843365 wrote:Open a checking account in your name only and have your direct deposit from work go to this account. Do NOT open this account in a bank where you have other accounts/joint accounts. Whatever joint accounts you have with her take out half of what ever is there. Cancel any joint credit cards and don't let her run up cc debt in your name.

She wants the trial separation so she moves out, not you. Arrange for daycare for kids while you are at work if you don't have it already.

Solid advice here.
Jul 27, 2011 3:40pm
Cleveland Buck's avatar

Cleveland Buck

Troll Hunter

5,126 posts
Jul 27, 2011 3:46 PM
thavoice;843376 wrote:If he should move out, would you all advise him to make sure the utilities are switched into her name? I know some, like DP&L power, start to report to the credit agencies if you are slow to payment.

He should not move out. Period.
Jul 27, 2011 3:46pm
T

thavoice

Senior Member

14,376 posts
Jul 27, 2011 3:47 PM
I know. I am asking if he does though...should he request that?
Just call it my own personal research
Jul 27, 2011 3:47pm
gerb131's avatar

gerb131

Senior Member

9,932 posts
Jul 27, 2011 4:13 PM
Beat her to the punch.
Jul 27, 2011 4:13pm
derek bomar's avatar

derek bomar

Senior Member

3,722 posts
Jul 27, 2011 5:49 PM
well, I would say first to just PIIHB. if that doesn't work, do what everyone else is suggesting.
Jul 27, 2011 5:49pm
justincredible's avatar

justincredible

Nick Mangold

32,056 posts
Jul 27, 2011 6:08 PM
derek bomar;843603 wrote:well, I would say first to just PIIHB. if that doesn't work, do what everyone else is suggesting.

Sound advice.
Jul 27, 2011 6:08pm