You are in the bigger cities and they are always busy with beggars and homeless people in the areas of the skyscrapers and the nicer areas….what’s your protocol in dealing with them?
Give them the “don’t even ask” look
Avoid at all cost
Avoid the vast majority give some change on occasion
Toss a dollar or two in every now and then or give a water or snack
A specific one you help out pretty regularly
Stories….go
Completely ignore and just walk past
posted by Laley23Completely ignore and just walk past
This.
So you are approaching a corner and one calmly takes a step or two toward you and isn’t scary or clearly scary problematic and asks you for some change or anything to help and you don’t even give them a “sorry man”?
I feel most everyone ignores or tries to ignore the majority of them but I still feel the need to be polite if they aren’t being rude or pushy.
I can say sorry man or keep walking/ignore. Either way they get the same answer they didn’t want.
Who has spare change on them anyways. I barely even carry cash.
posted by friendfromlowryI can say sorry man or keep walking/ignore. Either way they get the same answer they didn’t want.
Who has spare change on them anyways. I barely even carry cash.
Tougher market nowadays for sure
The ones that truly say they are hungry I volunteer every time to take them to the closest restaurant to us and buy them whatever they want to eat. Doesn’t matter what it is.
Had 2 people out of 100s take me up on it over 25 years.
One was right after my son was born and my wife wanted KFC across the street from the hospital.
In the parking lot late at night was a man asking people to buy him food.
I said “come on in, will buy you whatever you want”.
Bought him a whole bucket and he was all smiles.
Another time was in Mobile AL, in the summer their streets downtown are like Nashville just smaller scale, bands playing in every bar, in the street, etc.
Guy asked if I would buy him a hot dog at the vendor. Got him a hot dog, chips and a drink.
Everyone else I have ever offered to take right to the closest food vendor/restaurant has either just said no or even got pissed off I didn’t just give money.
Lol in Nashville they were mostly crazy and asking for money for booze or drugs….they gave no shits
DC was either assed up crazy on acid or pretty calm. I told one I’d catch him on way back from Panera Bread…he seemed excited. On way back stopped in Wawa and got him some $3 chicken bites under their heat lamp and a couple dollar…..actually walked the block to find him because forgot what he looked like, found him and he was happy as hell. Saw him the next day and gave me the big smile and thanked me again.
It was mid 90’s and one was just sitting looking parched as can be and I asked him if he needed something to drink. I told him to pick and he wanted a sweet tea. The $1.79 sure seemed to make his day.
The other 50 I ignored/avoided
The one woman in Chinatown cussed us as we said sorry.
The ones in Baltimore were aggressive and scared the wife and I.
The ones in Cleveland recently were aggressive and following and asking to buy a cheeseburger? Lol do t be entitled.
The ones in Nashville don’t sleep lol
posted by jmogThe ones that truly say they are hungry I volunteer every time to take them to the closest restaurant to us and buy them whatever they want to eat. Doesn’t matter what it is.
Had 2 people out of 100s take me up on it over 25 years.
everyone else I have ever offered to take right to the closest food vendor/restaurant has either just said no or even got pissed off I didn’t just give money.
Odd how that happens.
tl;dr alert
For people that approach directly asking for money to eat, especially the ones lurking in the shopping center parking lot, every one of them has turned down my offer to feed them. Every one. That's when you know they're not hungy.
For that reason, I do not interact with people holding signs at intersections. Exception: twice have had a strange feeling, like a voice telling me to notice them. Both times were in an area of town I'm not usually in One was a decrept bearded old guy, the other was a guy in his 20's. Each time I drove around the corner to a BK, and brought back a couple of sandwiches, fries, and hot coffee. The old guy broke down. thanked me, and actually bowed his head before he started eating. With the younger guy, turned out he was part of an actual homeless camp hidden in the trees - several adults and babies in there. Even though it was just one meal, they all came out to thank me.
I felt ashamed for not being thankful enough for what I have. Wish I could say I was like at all the time, but I'm not.
Discernment is the key. In our shopping center, we have two groups - 1. an actual homeless camp behind the stores next to the Scioto River. 2. a group of, shall we say, young adult meth heads or otherwise unproductive citizens. Interestingly, the actual homeless don't come out of their camp unless a church group brings food on certain days
The meth heads (for want of a better word) are another matter. You can pick them out in a heartbeat, hiking or riding children's bikes up and down the thoroughfare with backpacks on, checking on each other's take for the day, parked at all fast food spots. Pretty sure they're feeding a habit, and they give off a very negative vibe. I've seen them at their posts looking all forlorn, then I've seen them take a lunch break inside McDonald's, carrying on like they've beat the system. And then they hang out right in front of the local library doors, looking scuzzy and laughing nastily like they own the place, while moms with kids try to hurry past them to get inside.
The mh's carry signs that say "homeless - please help", but they all walk back to their nearby low-income apartments without any pretense. One guy holds his sign while sitting in a wheelchair at an intersection with his girlfriend sprawled on his lap. When they leave, they both walk back to their apartment, with her pushing the empty wheelchair.
About the only thing you can do for the second group is pray for them.
* * * * * *
The wife and I visited New Orleans some years ago, right outside the French Quarter. We quickly learned the homeless there set up for the night on the sidewalk under the marquees of hotels and other large businesses. Also learned they keep their area scrupulously neat, and do not bother pedestrians, other than to say good-morning. We just shook our head and guessed it works out for all concerned down there.
There’s one parking lot in the short north in Columbus where homeless like to shoot up and do drugs. There are always used needles in the lot. It’s also the easiest lot to find parking go figure. The homeless there always offer to make sure your cars not broken into for $1.
Will tend to give if they are working the "homeless veteran" angle.
Worst experience was when we were in downtown Cleveland at Jack Casino (formerly the Horseshoe) when my lady gets approached by a beggar at a slot machine asking her for money. How in the Hell did that person even get in the place?
posted by Ironman92So you are approaching a corner and one calmly takes a step or two toward you and isn’t scary or clearly scary problematic and asks you for some change or anything to help and you don’t even give them a “sorry man”?
I feel most everyone ignores or tries to ignore the majority of them but I still feel the need to be polite if they aren’t being rude or pushy.
Correct. I will side step without saying a word. Once you engage, even with "sorry", they follow and ask why. Living in and travelling in bigger cities I am extremely jaded by it all. I dont think I have said a word to a homeless/beggar in over a decade.
man all you bleeding heart liberals sure are cold when it comes to giving it up voluntarily.
I never have cash so I usually can’t give anything anyway. I have offered to buy food before. I bought a guy Jimmy John’s by the Reds ballpark once, he’s the only one to take me up on my offer.
posted by justincredibleI never have cash so I usually can’t give anything anyway. I have offered to buy food before. I bought a guy Jimmy John’s by the Reds ballpark once, he’s the only one to take me up on my offer.
They want money for alcohol and drugs, they don’t want food.
posted by Laley23Correct. I will side step without saying a word. Once you engage, even with "sorry", they follow and ask why. Living in and travelling in bigger cities I am extremely jaded by it all. I dont think I have said a word to a homeless/beggar in over a decade.
It has almost ruined it for me to the point that I am very skeptical if any stranger tries to speak to me in a city.
posted by like_thatIt has almost ruined it for me to the point that I am very skeptical if any stranger tries to speak to me in a city.
Unfortunately that is the case. Like most, I’d be happy to help someone who truly needed it. But feeding drug habits is not helping anyone.
