Giving advice to your significant other.

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Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 8:39 PM
So today I got an email from my gf who told me she is going to get an apartment asap with her friend and her friends bf when they get back in a few weeks from being out to sea. Now this friend of hers, well I know also, total shitbag (navy term), don't care for her too much and would hate to see my girl move in with her. Plus I have no idea how the hell she can even afford to split a apartment with 2 other people with utilities. We only make $700 (e3) twice a month. She does not and can't get BAH for you military people who know what I'm talking about. And she has a $300 car payment plus probably $200 in other bills a month.

So I want to email her and tell her nicely she needs to think things through. Every time I do something like this she gets pissed at me, cause I'm trying to be an "adult" and she knows how things go. Remember I'm 30 and she's 19. Anyways should I allow her to learn the hard way and most likely get screwed over or get her all pissed at me and tell her it's a completely bad idea.
Mar 21, 2010 8:39pm
hoops23's avatar

hoops23

Senior Member

15,696 posts
Mar 21, 2010 8:52 PM
Tell her how you feel, but you're 30? No way!

I think you're 25 and lying about your age to sound more seasoned.
Mar 21, 2010 8:52pm
sleeper's avatar

sleeper

Legend

27,879 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:10 PM
You're 30 and banging a 19 year old?

LOL
Mar 21, 2010 9:10pm
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:13 PM
sleeper wrote: You're 30 and banging a 19 year old?

LOL
He's da WOman.


As for OP(aka "da WOman"), tell her what you think.
Mar 21, 2010 9:13pm
hoops23's avatar

hoops23

Senior Member

15,696 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:15 PM
The OP is a woman.
Mar 21, 2010 9:15pm
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:18 PM
fixed ^
Mar 21, 2010 9:18pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:18 PM
Yeah I am 30 and am a woman lol. What's wrong with banging a 19 year old?
Mar 21, 2010 9:18pm
hasbeen's avatar

hasbeen

Excuse me, Flo?

6,504 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:19 PM
Ytowngirlinfla wrote: What's wrong with banging a 19 year old?
She's not 18 is the only problem.
Mar 21, 2010 9:19pm
tk421's avatar

tk421

Senior Member

8,500 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:20 PM
Ytowngirlinfla wrote: Yeah I am 30 and am a woman lol. What's wrong with banging a 19 year old?
Nothing, we're just jealous. :D:D You wouldn't happen to have a web cam, would you? :P
Mar 21, 2010 9:20pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:20 PM
Haha I have a webcam. But she's in Washington state and I'm in chicago right now.
Mar 21, 2010 9:20pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:25 PM
What was a sincere question has again turned into lesbians on cam? Where do I sign up?
Mar 21, 2010 9:25pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:35 PM
Lets not turn this into that. It's a serious question. We can get into that later.
Mar 21, 2010 9:35pm
gerb131's avatar

gerb131

Senior Member

9,932 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:37 PM
Hear that creaking? Its Fab1B's foot kicking the door open.
Mar 21, 2010 9:37pm
sleeper's avatar

sleeper

Legend

27,879 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:39 PM
In all seriousness, you should be able to give advice to your SO without a problem. If you can't at least give advice to your SO, then the relationship probably won't work out.
Mar 21, 2010 9:39pm
Writerbuckeye's avatar

Writerbuckeye

Senior Member

4,745 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:39 PM
You provide (in a nice way) your life's experience with such matters to her, and then you back off and let her go down the crapper, if that's where she wants to go.

Anything else you try to do will be seen as too intrusive in the way of interfering with her choices as an adult.

Besides, these lessons don't work unless you muck through the shit all by yourself. :)
Mar 21, 2010 9:39pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:42 PM
I agree with the above advice. I question, is it all about her falling on her face with this move? Or are you a bit jealous of her living with this guy and girl?
Mar 21, 2010 9:42pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:46 PM
no I just think it's stupid. There is no way she can afford it. She'll get in over her head and in the Navy money issues will affect your job and security clearance. I don't care who it is she moves in with. I'm just looking out for her in the long run and I don't want the I should have listened to you later on.
Mar 21, 2010 9:46pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:51 PM
No jealousies or insecurities whatsoever?
Mar 21, 2010 9:51pm
Cleveland Buck's avatar

Cleveland Buck

Troll Hunter

5,126 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:51 PM
19 year olds think they know everything no matter you tell them. In reality, they know absolutely nothing, and will be fucking up for years before they figure out that you were right.

Anyway, here's the game plan. Let her fuck up. She is going to do it anyway. Just don't let her know ahead of time that you know she is fucking up. Just act surprised when she is bitching that she has no money or her roommates are animals. That way she can't blame you for not trying to talk her out of it when you knew it was a mistake.
Mar 21, 2010 9:51pm
wes_mantooth's avatar

wes_mantooth

Tomfoolery & shenanigans

17,977 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:51 PM
sleeper wrote: You're 30 and banging a 19 year old?

LOL
Nothing wrong with that.:D
Mar 21, 2010 9:51pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:52 PM
september63 wrote: No jealousies or insecurities whatsoever?
Nope no jealousy or anything.
Mar 21, 2010 9:52pm
ernest_t_bass's avatar

ernest_t_bass

12th Son of the Lama

24,984 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:53 PM
I guess I'm late to the party, as far as knowing you were a lesbian.

It's kinda cool having two lesbians here. You and mtrulz.
Mar 21, 2010 9:53pm
Ytowngirlinfla's avatar

Ytowngirlinfla

I wear real chevrons!

2,295 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:57 PM
I don't label myself.
Mar 21, 2010 9:57pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Mar 21, 2010 9:57 PM
LOL. Oh no you didnt?
Mar 21, 2010 9:57pm
september63's avatar

september63

Senior Member

5,789 posts
Mar 21, 2010 10:00 PM
Well................being 30 and dating a 19yr old. These are the issues you will face. Many life experiences you have encountered that will be new to her. IF it is a ralationship that is going to survive, you will give your advice and let her make her own decision?
Mar 21, 2010 10:00pm