Devils Advocate
Posts: 4,539
Dec 10, 2012 3:53pm
The following was posted from TB on another site, somewhere in the neigborhood of 2005. In observing the x*mas spirit, I have chosen to share this with you all....
Jesus H. X!
For you math junkies...
x= It's Ok to ignore everyone the other 364 days a year
x= They will love you if you spend enough on them
x= Let's make up another lie for children to believe
x= Sacrifice a conifer to Christ and let it rot in your house
x=If there was actually a list of ways to take Christ's name in vain, Christmas would probably be #1
x= If Jesus saw what we have done with his Birthday ( move it to the wrong part of the year and rename a Pagan holidayafer it) He would probably nail himself to a cross and set himself on fire.
The problem with Xmas, as I see it, is that I'd rather just keep my money and buy myself whatever the fuck I want. But we're not allowed to do that. Even if you're born Jewish, Muslim, agnostic or atheist, your chances of escaping the clutches of this insidious holiday are quite low if you reside anywhere in the Western world. I mean, how many Jews do you know who don't observe Xmas? Even the frickin' Japanese in Japan go through the motions, though if you asked them what it was all about, they'd probably confess their belief it's just an excuse to wrap and give gifts, which is like sex for them.
Neither will your friends or family let you overlook the season. If you have enough Money, you might be able to skip work and hole up somewhere with a keg of Jim Beam, a bag of weed, and a massive porno collection. But most of us have to work, so that's out. Feigning your own death might be worth it, but alas, this only works once a decade. The second time you do it, folks are quick to guess that you're not really dead.
Fuck you... Fuck me.... Fuck this X-mas shit.
Merry x-mas buddy. If there is a God, I guess I'll see you in hell....D.A.
Jesus H. X!
For you math junkies...
x= It's Ok to ignore everyone the other 364 days a year
x= They will love you if you spend enough on them
x= Let's make up another lie for children to believe
x= Sacrifice a conifer to Christ and let it rot in your house
x=If there was actually a list of ways to take Christ's name in vain, Christmas would probably be #1
x= If Jesus saw what we have done with his Birthday ( move it to the wrong part of the year and rename a Pagan holidayafer it) He would probably nail himself to a cross and set himself on fire.
The problem with Xmas, as I see it, is that I'd rather just keep my money and buy myself whatever the fuck I want. But we're not allowed to do that. Even if you're born Jewish, Muslim, agnostic or atheist, your chances of escaping the clutches of this insidious holiday are quite low if you reside anywhere in the Western world. I mean, how many Jews do you know who don't observe Xmas? Even the frickin' Japanese in Japan go through the motions, though if you asked them what it was all about, they'd probably confess their belief it's just an excuse to wrap and give gifts, which is like sex for them.
Neither will your friends or family let you overlook the season. If you have enough Money, you might be able to skip work and hole up somewhere with a keg of Jim Beam, a bag of weed, and a massive porno collection. But most of us have to work, so that's out. Feigning your own death might be worth it, but alas, this only works once a decade. The second time you do it, folks are quick to guess that you're not really dead.
Fuck you... Fuck me.... Fuck this X-mas shit.
Merry x-mas buddy. If there is a God, I guess I'll see you in hell....D.A.
S
sportchampps
Posts: 7,361
Dec 10, 2012 6:08pm
Lmao
Devils Advocate
Posts: 4,539
Dec 10, 2012 6:36pm
I can't believe p o r no is adsense efiing blocked...
said_aouita
Posts: 8,532
Dec 11, 2012 7:12am
It's always those slant eyed bastards fault.Devils Advocate;1339937 wrote: Even the frickin' Japanese in Japan go through the motions, though if you asked them what it was all about, they'd probably confess their belief it's just an excuse to wrap and give gifts, which is like sex for them.
bases_loaded
Posts: 6,912
Dec 11, 2012 8:16am
He forgot. Bah humbug
Devils Advocate
Posts: 4,539
Dec 24, 2012 3:12pm
Bumped because fuck you.
mcburg93
Posts: 3,167
Dec 24, 2012 5:17pm
reps when I can
T
Tiernan
Posts: 13,021
Jan 1, 2013 12:43am
cockblock this thread