2019 Pittsburgh Pirates --- everyone else in the division is in drive, we're in neutral

  • Wed, Jul 31, 2019 3:38 PM

    A complete collapse after the All-Star Break punctuated by them simply handing Dickerson to the Phillies. Yeah, he's only a two-month rental, but you'd think they'd at least try to get more than "international bonus allotments and a player to be named later" for a .300+ hitter who won a Gold Glove last year. But no, not having to pay the final $2.9M they'd owe him for this year is apparently enough.

    Fuck Bob Nutting and every fucking shitbag in the front office. If someone blasted the tops of their heads off at close range with a shotgun, I would celebrate the way most fans celebrate a World Series. Because with them in charge, that'd be the only fucking way I'll ever get that celebration because they're happy being shitty 90% of the time, playing for a future that peaks with having brief runs at the postseason before fading back to sucking and doing everything humanly possible to avoid actually trying to be financially competitive, while Nutting pockets every last bit of competitive balance money to make sure his personal bank account is competitive with other super-rich assholes.

    Here's to an off-season of making a big splash by signing a 33-year old pitcher coming off a 5.68 ERA year where he was demoted to the bullpen because he was the absolute drizzling shits as a starter because they are "sure" they'll be able to fix him and getting a .215 hitting middle infielder or catcher because they like his moxie WHILE every single good young player on the team counts the days until they get close to free agency, so they can get traded to a franchise that actually gives a shit, or at least pretends to.

    Wed, Jul 31, 2019 3:49 PM

     

    Yeah, but that was THE BEST brawl in MLB in 5 decades ………going back to when the Bucs/Reds went at it in the early ‘70’s and Pedro Borbon was in the pile biting people. 

    Wed, Jul 31, 2019 3:56 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    Yeah, but that was THE BEST brawl in MLB in 5 decades ………going back to when the Bucs/Reds went at it in the early ‘70’s and Pedro Borbon was in the pile biting people. 

    Yeah, that fight will go down as the high point of their season. For one night and one night only, the Pirates got a starring role on SportsCenter!!!!

    Fri, Aug 2, 2019 6:14 PM

    Ah, they DFA'd Kang today, both because he absolutely sucked and because he was a few ABs away from a $650K boost to his contract.

    He was such a revelation, hitting for good average and crushing dingers initially, then he had the alcohol issues and the "not allowed a work visa because of the alcohol issues" issues and then he finally got back and wound up with a terminal case of the "Mendoza line is so far up there I can't even see it, let alone reach it" issues. Without the power production that kept guys like Rob Deer and Joey Gallo in the line-up despite their .170 seasons.

    Fuck him. You can go back to drinking full-time now, bitch.

    Fri, Aug 2, 2019 8:21 PM
    posted by Heretic

     

    Fuck him. You can go back to drinking full-time now, bitch.

    One of the greatest send offs I’ve ever read. 

    Tue, Aug 20, 2019 10:48 AM

    Highlights of the second half of the season:

    1. They got to meet the Little League World Series players to see what actual winners look like. Unfortunately, they haven't learned anything, but they did get to watch them in person.

    2. Got nothing so far, but hopefully some people in the front office get fired or Bob Nutting is murdered (since he'll never be forced to sell the team to a non-cheapass).

    Tue, Aug 20, 2019 3:21 PM
    posted by BRF

    One of the greatest send offs I’ve ever read. 

     

    He could have called him an oriental or slant-eye, but surprisingly held off.

    Tue, Aug 20, 2019 4:07 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    He could have called him an oriental or slant-eye, but surprisingly held off.

    🤦‍♀️

    Wed, Aug 21, 2019 1:03 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    He could have called him an oriental or slant-eye, but surprisingly held off.

    I'm not a Trumper, so my mind doesn't immediately go towards slurs like yours apparently does, dude.

    Wed, Aug 21, 2019 2:57 PM
    posted by Heretic

    I'm not a Trumper, so my mind doesn't immediately go towards slurs like yours apparently does, dude.

     

    You’re obviously not a Trumper; hoping for people to be murdered is Anitfa-like.

    Thu, Aug 22, 2019 12:46 PM

    That was an even lazier jab than mine directed towards you, since it was essentially a slightly-altered copy...for shame, you truly are a bit lacking when unable to simply cut-n-paste cherry-picked links. And still doesn't explain why, when confronted with a criticism of a foreign-born player who was released for sucking, your brain immediately went to slurs.

    Damn, the Pirates have gotten so pathetic and not worth my attention now that this stupid argument is more entertaining than saying anything pertaining to them. Here's to another 10-run loss tonight and continuation of this shit tomorrow!

    Thu, Aug 22, 2019 3:24 PM

     

    Well they certainly have been getting their asses kicked lately.  Probably get a nice box seat for $5.  Thank God for the Penguins.

    Thu, Aug 22, 2019 3:57 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    Well they certainly have been getting their asses kicked lately.  Probably get a nice box seat for $5.  Thank God for the Penguins.

    I read about how some of the Little Leaguers were at one of the Washington games and commented on how it didn't seem like anyone was there (about 10K announced attendance or so), so I'd guess you could sit about anywhere at a game now.

    Saw they waived Cervelli today. Kind of a bummer because he was a big part of some of their success, but dude couldn't stay healthy and got so many head injuries, I wouldn't be surprised if he got a concussion just trying to process that news.

    Thu, Aug 22, 2019 6:31 PM
    posted by Heretic

    I wouldn't be surprised if he got a concussion just trying to process that news.

    You are very good at these send off comments!

     

     

     

    Fri, Aug 23, 2019 10:36 AM
    posted by BRF

    You are very good at these send off comments!

     

     

     

    Sadly, I was mistaken on that one. He got waived after requesting it in order to try to sign with a contender. And I can't even say that he must still be concussed to think a team would want an injury-plagued catcher who was batting under .200 before being concussed this year, as it appears that he'll sign with Atlanta since McCann went down and the Pirates are on the hook for the majority of his contract regardless.

    Sad to see a good line go to waste...

    Fri, Aug 23, 2019 2:03 PM

     

    Reds are in town this weekend I think; might pay $10 to see another great brawl.

    Fri, Aug 23, 2019 3:31 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    Reds are in town this weekend I think; might pay $10 to see another great brawl.

    The only form of entertainment they're able to provide. Well, other than opponents' home runs. Saw that last night, they set a new team record for most dingers given up in a season. A full-season record. On Aug. 22. How in the...?!?

    Fri, Aug 23, 2019 4:23 PM

     

    And I think the Orioles just set the major league record.

    Fri, Aug 23, 2019 4:41 PM
    posted by QuakerOats

     

    And I think the Orioles just set the major league record.

    Yeah, I think the Yankees were responsible for about half of their total by themselves. Something like 17-1 in 18 games, hitting multiple homers in virtually all of them.

    Tue, Sep 17, 2019 12:54 PM

    So, just going out quietly, losing lots of games and not making any waves at all...and then you wake up one fine day to find that the only fucking good pitcher on your team just got arrested for child porn and soliciting a minor. WHAT THE FLYING FUCK IS HAPPENING?!?!?!?!?!?!

    Ad